About the Author
I’ve usually only posted infield videos of Mehow, but I’ve heard that his ebook is quite good so I searched out some of his writing to see what he had to offer.
This article I found is all about being the value. What I found of use in this article is Mehow’s advice on using a routine. Its all about how you tell it, rather than exactly what you have said. Agreed!
How to be the Value by Mehow
Now, before we get into the individual specific examples of how to give value… I want to give you one more bit of solid theory, so you know where we are going with this episode.
I was prompted to write this because a student emailed me and asked:
“Are there any general guiding principles for ‘being the value’?”
The simple answer to this question is, “Yes, there are.”
The biggest one is to subcommunicate being the value.
Let me explain:
You see, you always have to subcommunicate (that is, covertly communicate) the “being” part, while overtly communicating the value aspect.
Sometimes, you can get away with the value and “the being”, both being subcommunicated.
Consider the projection from the previous episode:
“You know what I would do with you… I would wrap you in bubble wrap…until you are all warm and squishy…and then, I would put you in my luggage…and take you to New York, and we would go to…Tiffany’s…and I would deck you all out in Tiffany’s, so when we came right back to this bar right here…you would be my Tiffany’s princess…and all your friends would be completely jealous.”
Now overtly, the story is fun and very emotionally stimulating… and, both “Fun” and “Emotion Stimulation” are examples of overtly giving value.
But in order for this story to work, we have to “be the value”.
Stated differently: You have to simply subcommunicate that you are both a fun, and emotionally stimulating guy.
To take it one step further, let me explain how this could be done wrong.
Doing this wrong would be saying something to the effect of:
“I’m super FUN … check this out… <projection>”
Bottom line: Don’t do that!
It just will not work - it is trying too hard, and high value guys don’t exhibit this behavior.
To do this right, there are four subcommunication techniques you should use to get the “being” across:
1. Deliver the story as if she is your little sister, and tell her zany shit all the time because that is just who you are.
2. Deliver the story as if you have said stuff like this a million times, to a million girls, but this particular story was improvised just for them.
3. Make it appear improvised on the spot… and, pause… as if… you are… thinking about what to say next.
4. Eliminate all nervous movements, twitches, or ticks from your body language and delivery.
Incidentally, if you use and master the above techniques, (and, there are dozens more), you will be able to subcommunicate without thinking too much about ‘giving value’ per se… and, you will find yourself giving value almost automatically!
In fact, my entire Get the Girl book focuses intensely on subcommunication for that exact reason.
In the subsequent episodes, I will get into specific ways of giving value and what the subcommunications for the ‘being’
should be.
Now, start working on the above techniques, and…
Be Social,
-Mehow
Read More:
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4
January 4, 2008
my friend raves about the book as well. he is sending me a copy and i can’t wait to read it.
also, i ordered The Jeffy Show from RSD. Anyone else?? I expect good things. I’ll keep you all posted
January 4, 2008
When I started the article I was a little skeptical, but he won me over big time by the end. Great piece.
T’s last blog post..Vision vs. Discipline, or Why I Don’t Do New Year’s Resolutions
January 4, 2008
I’ve seen Mehow in person and wasn’t TOO impressed. Nice guy tho.
Seduction Chronicles’s last blog post..Over 1000+ Subscribers and Growing!
January 4, 2008
i’ve read something similar to this before but it wasnt about value it was about creating emotions by coming up with stories like that…i havent really tried it that much but i like it and ima try to use it more often..
so how many of yall been using “Because” more? Ive been using it everywhere even at work and it works really well!
January 4, 2008
hey fred and whoever else is having problems with their avatar not showing,this is what i found out at bloglog….
Q.My Avatar doesn’t show up when I leave comments on blogs
A.The way that feature works is that it finds you based on the email address and blog address you input when you leave the comment. If those are the same as what you have on file at MyBlogLog, then the system will match your avatar and profile to your comment. If they are different, then it won’t find you in the system and no avatar will appear. However, every once in a while, we do see a few accounts that just won’t match up. This is a bug, and we’ve not yet found out why it’s occurring. For most people, the reason their avatar doesn’t show up is because their email/web address doesn’t match our records, but if you are doing that correctly, then it’s likely that you are an unfortunate member of the bug club. We’re very sorry if that is the case and we are working to fix it.
i didnt know where else to post this
January 4, 2008
that sucks, we’re part of the bug club.
January 4, 2008
test. if this doesnt work, go ahead and delete this comment. im just trying to see if the changes i made to my profile worked and will show my picture now..
January 4, 2008
Ugh.
Fat liquor store clean up guy:
“Fuck My Life.”
January 5, 2008
I love the whole “treat them like they’re your little sister” thing. It’s a great way to put yourself at a higher status in her.
Status=Attraction.
-Seraf
January 5, 2008
I’ve studied Mehows book thoroughly since I first got it in July of last year. He has some really great stuff on being playful and initiating kino.
January 5, 2008
Seraf is right all the way. It’s always about puting yourself at a higher value then her, that way they are inclined to chase you.
It’s a good theory and I’ll be sure to test it out.
-Rubix
Rubix’s last blog post..Hoop Theory
April 29, 2009
giving value is huge. When you trancend the ego, this is where giving value becomes so incredibly potent-because there is no self serving purpose in it. You’re ‘being’ fun not because fun=getting laid but because you have everything you could ever possibly want or need and the byproduct of that is positive emotions that infect other people.