Vegas baby! The porn convention, AVN, AMA, P-A-R-T-Y!

So about two Friday’s ago, I think? (shrugs shoulders) I was at my friends house. He was home visiting from California, where he now lives. He comes home every once and a while to visit his friends from the old days so I always make time for him.

This time he comes home with his lady friend and I don’t end up seeing him that much since he is more than occupied, O well no worries. I was nice to see him anyway. We partied on New Years and had a great time anyway. So this was his last night and I tracked him down to hang out. Turns out he had sent his lady friend home because of technical difficulties and was now going on with his trip solo. He had also mentioned earlier in the trip that he was meeting friends in Vegas for the AVN Adult Video Network Awards on the way back home.

“Sounds great”, I said

He replies, “come with me. I’ll buy you your ticket!”

Now it took some convincing, but I ended up saying yes. Turns out he had an extra ticket now that the lady friend had been retired. So I was in, we headed back to my place to change and pack a few things and took off, literally!

Now at this point I really don’t know what to expect. I probably had a total of $350 spending money, no hotel room and no idea where I was going to stay or sleep. Silly me, I’m in Vegas, I’ll probably end up passing out somewhere for little and not need to much sleep at all to make it through the few days. Boy was I wrong, but I’ll get to that in a minute.

We land and go straight to a hotel where his friends are already staying. We go up to the room and roll up some “cigarettes” to have before we grab a bite to eat. At this point I have been up for 24 hours straight already. After we eat we head back to the room to relax for a little (10 mins) and quickly head back to the casino. Being that I had limited funds I kept my gambling to a minimum and watched my friends drop their loads.

After walking about 4 miles in the casino, I realized that we were just going in circles. Those casino designers really thought it out when they built them, you can’t get out and my friends just couldn’t stop pumping money in the machines. This is the one thing I don’t really like about Vegas, sometimes you just go crazy from watching and playing all those games.

Finally we get back to the hotel and get ready to go out. I wanted to head over to the local dance clubs or bars to do some pick-ups but they have their heart set on going to “Scores”, since the trip was basically a gift I am more than obliged to go along. Plus I really went to hang with my friends who I only see once every year or two.

And were off, we get to the strip club and things are immediately heading out of control. My friends quickly pair up with some girls, I decide to wait and see what is there, scope it out a little. Out of nowhere this girl comes up to me and is aggressively rubbing against me. I soon realize that she is pretty drunk herself, not to mention smoking hot, and I decide to stick with her to have some fun. For some reason strippers really like me, I know what your thinking, thats their job, but it’s different. On a various occasions they give me numbers, free multiple dances and if you read my craziest match.com date post then you know how that one liked me too.

Anyway things are going good and the girls are now trying to get us upstairs to the rooms for dances. My friend, without asking me, immediately pays my girl to take me up, what a great guy. lol We all head upstairs and begin are dances. Long episode short, this girl keeps me up there way after our time and now I’m getting watched by the bouncers. After about an hour, my friend comes back upstairs with his girl and says we have to leave in 10 minutes because one of our other friends has been kicked out. God dam Yeager bombs! Now were all so fuc*ed up that we end up forgetting about him. Another 45 minutes go by and we finally decide to leave. The girl I was with puts her number in my phone and calls her phone to show me it’s real. We leave…

We go back to the casino and continue to get obliterated on the free drinks and goodies. I think we got 2.5 hours of sleep that night, but a fun one it was.

Next Morning

I wake up to my phone going off from an unopened text message. It’s actually 2 messages. First message states, “sorry I didn’t call, I got in trouble last night.” Now the second message which came about 25 minutes later said. “Sorry dude, I have a huge di*k too and it’s all she needs, sorry” So I’m guessing her boyfriend who does not trust her (wonder why) found out and then took her phone to text me, but why make that comment about your di*k? Maybe she was talking about riding mine in her sleep, who knows probably just a little penis envy..it happens 😉 It was all pretty entertaining anyway, we laughed and then we were off for another morning cigarette, ahhhh.

After taking a post brunch nap, we get ready to go to the convention. The whole time they were telling me to put it off, “don’t worry, we’ll go tomorrow” We go down to the show and it turns out it’s about an hour before it’s over. Awesome!

So we scratch that idea and I just figure that I was heading home with no good close-up picks. I mean we still had the awards to go to, but that was more of a professional event. Although the guys I was with def did it in style.

We head to another acquaintances room and then head down to get a car, where I realized they had rented a nice hummer limo to take us. Feels good to hang out with pimps like that..

The awards were interesting, the best part was walking the walkway to get in, there I felt like a real pimp, and was probably presumed to be one as well. People snapping photos everywhere, it was like a low grade red carpet, still fun though. Oh and on the line I ran into Brandi from “Rock of Love” season 1 with Brett Michaels, seems like she put on a little weight since the show, wow did I just type that outloud! Sorry Brandi…