Il GIUSTO senso volare da solo è saltare nella parte consumata, subito. È COSÌ importante.
Una volta che avete ottenuto il giusto mindset per l'assolo funzionante, il divertimento reale comincia. One of the biggest pros about solo is the freedom - you don’t need to worry about losing a friend, or if he’s got the right kind of dress to get into where you’re going, or meeting up to drive back together… If you meet a girl, you can talk to her for as long as you like, and if the two of you decide to go somewhere else, you are freed from having to bring your buddy along or tell him he’s going to have to find another ride. Knowing that you don’t have to check up on anyone else can be a huge weight off your shoulders too.
Now, one thing that stops a lot of people from running solo in nighttime venues like bars and clubs is social pressure. The
feeling that everyone who is out will somehow magically be aware that you’re out on your own, and that people are going to somehow look at you and judge you as being by yourself
Okay, this is perfectly normal to think, but it’s crazy. All it’s going to take to overcome is getting out there and seeing the
results that ensue.
Most people actually don’t think there’s anything strange or weird about other people going out alone if you’re comfortable with it. It indicates you’re really social and outgoing. When you go out alone at night, people will sometimes ask you if you’re there by yourself or where your friends are. Most of the time you hear this, it’s a huge positive and means the person you’re talking to is interested in you. Hhere’s a couple example standard responses:
“I moved here a little bit ago and thought I’d check out some new places and make some new friends.”
“My buddies were being lame and staying in tonight, but I just had to come out.”
“Yeah, I’ve got some friends who are at our regular hangout, but I just wanted to explore somewhere new tonight, and here I am.”
One great boon about going out solo is that it’s a lot easier to meet women who are alone too. If you go out during the
daytime, solo is almost always preferable for actually meeting women (having a friend to meet up with in between interactions can be fun though too). At nighttime, being alone makes it easier for you to meet women who are there alone and looking to meet a man who is too. They feel less intimidated by a man who is alone than a man with a group of friends. Note that women going out alone are usually only out early in the night (they tend to meet a man then and pair up for the rest of the evening, or go home alone if it starts getting later and they didn’t meet anyone they liked). This is also very dependent on the venue - some kinds of places are much more likely to have women going alone than others (i.e., medium-sized, social lounges or lower energy nightclubs).
A final great advantage of going out solo is more far-reaching than simply meeting women. Going out solo builds character. It teaches you to be independent, self-reliant, and self-motivating. If you can learn to feel secure and confident going out alone into a loud, crowded nightclub, you can do just about anything. It takes time to get comfortable running solo, but it’s a powerful, powerful ability to have. Not only does it add a great level of flexibility to your socializing - it makes you a stronger, more centered, more well-rounded man.
Chase Amante
Check out the amazing live infield pickups that Chase and Sebastian put together on Master the Vibe.
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May 14, 2008
"A final great advantage of going out solo is more far-reaching than simply meeting women. Going out solo builds character. It teaches you to be independent, self-reliant, and self-motivating. If you can learn to feel secure and confident going out alone into a loud, crowded nightclub, you can do just about anything. It takes time to get comfortable running solo, but it’s a powerful, powerful ability to have. Not only does it add a great level of flexibility to your socializing - it makes you a stronger, more centered, more well-rounded man"
That is very well said. One question can this work for someone like me who isn’t a "social butterfly" so to speak?
May 14, 2008
its so true, when your out with the same people all of the time you start to become dependent on them so when you are thrust into an interaction alone its very difficult.
Oh and btw, I recieved my prize in the mail yesterday, thanx again Bobby!
May 14, 2008
Great article. Because of a couple of factors, I have to fly solo primarily and I’ve been doing it for awhile. I won’t say I prefer it, but I’m perfectly comfortable going out alone and it’s similar to how Chase describes…some amazing nights and some clunkers.
Those are good response lines when someone asks you if you’re out alone, I’ll remember’em
I have a tip that conflicts a bit with what Chase wrote. When I go it alone, I always remember to "let the game come to me," that is I don’t push too much in the beginning and I wait for sets and people to come across my path. So, for instance, I’ll go out and watch an NBA game at a bar, and during the course of the game I’ll open 7-8 sets. Those first few sets may go nowhere, or they might simply be guys who are also hoops fans. No matter. By the last few sets, I’ll usually have approached mixed or all-girl sets. So I don’t sweat it if it’s a slow night. This keeps me from the emotional rollercoaster and also becoming an approach robot, where my whole night is built around approaches. In fact, when I sarge alone, I’m usually out for something besides sarging, like a game or shopping at the mall.
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