Do You Have a “Can’t Do” Mentality?

By

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Do You Search for Excuse?  Or Answers?

Do you look for ways to solve a problem? Or do you look for excuses as to why it can’t be solved?

I’ve come to realize that those who get ahead in life… create solutions. Those who fall behind… create excuses.

And most of the time, we’ve made our mind up before we even attempt to tackle the problem.

Every year my friends and I plan a group vacation. At the beginning of the summer there are always five or six of that vow to go. By the time the trip rolls around it never fails that 3 or 4 of them will back out. They’ll make excuses like “I don’t have the money.” or “I’m too busy.” But the truth is if you want something… you make it happen. These same guys who always back out- have a”can’t do” mentality in regards to taking a vacation. Most of them have more time and money than I do… yet they look for the reasons it’s not possible.

I realized I was doing this awhile back in regards to the technical aspects of running this website. I’ve always viewed myself as being incompetent with computers… so whenever an issue arose, I wouldsign immediately call Mike Stoute to solve it for me.

Occasionally a situation would come up where Mike wasn’t available to help me. I would usually give it a half-assed attempt… before quickly deciding that I just couldn’t do it.

Was I that computer illiterate that I couldn’t solve these problems on my own? No. It was just easier and more convenient to decide I couldn’t and cast the job to someone else.

The truth was… I didn’t want to put the effort in to make it work. I had already had a preconceived notion that I couldn’t do it. So at the first obstacle I came to… I gave up.

It’s easier to say I’m not a good dancer… then to take the time to learn to dance.

It’s easier to say I’m not good with cars… then to attempt to do an oil change yourself.

It’s easier to say I’m not I can’t take good photos… then it is to get to know the intricacies of your camera.

It’s easier to say I don’t have the time… then to get your fat ass to the gym every day.

My point is… your attitude going into a situation will directly affect your outcome.

What I’ve found is that people that have a “can’t do” mentality usually don’t limit it to just one area of their life.

How many more limitless possibilities would open up if you suddenly took on the “I can do it” mentality?

What if your mentality was “with a little effort and patience anything is possible.”

How much further do you think you would get in life?

Just food for the brain.


About Bobby Rio

I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences.  For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.

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4 Comments

  1. Sebastian

    August 5, 2008 at 1:47 am

    Great point and yet another something, I think we ALL (everyone including myself) are guilty of doing a little bit at least from time to time.

    Incidentally, my thing is also with computers and changing oil, fixing stuff around the house and just generally not being good with technical/practical things. I guess now that I think about it, a lot of times I am accepting defeat before I even ATTEMPT to fix something.

    It is also an area that makes my confidence lower than it should be, because I don’t know if it’s the media or culture or whatever, I have this image in my head of the ideal guy being good with fixing stuff around house and not needing to call people to help with even little things. Someone like my own dad who seems to know just about how to do everything. Of course I don’t beat up myself for not having these skills like I used to and realize that we all have our weaknesses and I guess this is one of mine and that’s OK, because I’m a freakin genius and great at so many other skills in life and so many other things women look for and find attractive in a man.

    Of course, I also will be trying to remove this weakness step by step by becoming more competent at this stuff and already have got a start and am more capable of taking care of certain problems than I used to be a few months back. 🙂

  2. Style Habits

    August 6, 2008 at 1:07 pm

    It’s particularly difficult to avoid the “can’t do” mentality, I’m sure we’re all guilty of it. It’s a nasty bugger that affects all of your decisions in your life so you have to attack at all levels.

    Style Habitss last blog post..The Secret of Great Fitting Shirts

  3. Ryan

    August 6, 2008 at 10:23 pm

    Dude, Nice Job. Impressive way to Look at success. Lot of us have hidden fears / own limits built in the mind, that we cant not get rid of.

  4. Kurt

    August 23, 2008 at 7:10 pm

    50% there….atttitude is important but just as important is skill set…you can have the greatest attitude in the world but if your skill set is subpar or lacking in direction, you will not succeed…the community does itself a disservice by not looking at it from that point…its skill set plus attitude…both are as equally important….

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