About the Author
How to Make Women Laugh
It was only recently I came to realize that making women laugh was completely different than I had previously thought.
For the longest time I used to believe that that the same humor that had my friends rolling on the floor in laughter would naturally cause the same reaction in the women I was talking to.
Wouldn’t it make sense? Isn’t comedy supposed to be universal? Shouldn’t that be that how to make a girl laugh?
But when I really started to pay attention to what women were laughing at I started to notice;
- The sarcastic wit that made me a hit around most of my guy friends very seldom got positive reactions around women.
- Some of the guys I knew who had the lamest, most childish humor, often seemed to get the best reaction of women.
- Women very rarely judged the originality and cleverness of humor the way my guy friends did.
So what do women find funny?
About four years ago I really started to get serious about trying to figure out what I was doing wrong with my interactions with women. It was at this point that I came across a book that taught the concept of cocky and funny. The concept made a lot of sense, so I tweaked my humor, and started interacting with women in this new, different manner.
Having misunderstood the advice contained within the book, I set out to basically bully women into liking me. I used sharp sarcasm and ironic wit to often humiliate women.
The worst thing that happened to me was that I actually found several girls that just ate this shit up. These few women loved it. And I took it as sign that this was the correct way to make women laugh, so I proceeded to use this same humor on every woman I met.
And failed miserably.
What I hadn’t realized was that the few girls that seemed to really enjoy this sarcastic humor, while attractive, were somewhat of tomboys with a masculine energy that didn’t represent the rest of the female population.
I was about to give up.
Then one day I just sat there and watched my friend Will interact with women. Will had always been somewhat of a natural with women. I could never understand it as I found his humor silly and childish… and he rarely said anything that would have any of my male friends laughing.
As I watched him, I began to pay more attention to the way women were reacting to him.
The women that were surrounding him had a permanent smile on their faces. While they were never rolling on the floor laughing… they were constantly in a state of playfulness and fun.
Now curious, I began to hone in on exactly what he was doing. As I listened I found that he was interacting with them the same way a fourth grade boy would interact with a fourth grade girl on the playground.
There was no ground breaking humor.
Instead there was constant silliness. He was perpetually teasing them. He was making funny faces. Using his voice to tell stories in a way that reminded me of an over energized nine year old telling the story of how he beat up the town bully. There was an endless barrage of only mildly amusing jokes, goofy movie quotes, and shameless physical flirting. (this post provides more examples of the type of conversation that women find funny.)
But the girls were eating it up.
It was right then that I came to realize that women don’t want funny.
They want fun.
I had always concentrated so hard on finding those perfect one-liners that would pronounce me the king of comedy and have my audience amazed at my originality and wit…. That I forgot who my audience was…
Women aren’t that funny.
Women don’t really care about original, witty, and sharp humor.
Women want to have fun.
They don’t want to have to think. And if your jokes are making them think too much, you’re probably taking them out of the moment.
A simple process for having fun with women
If you’re a guy having trouble making women laugh, then your first step is to look around and pay attention to what they are actually laughing at.
- You’ll see that they much rather watch silly romantic comedies than the witty indie dark comedies that win all the awards.
- You’ll see that they don’t care much about the originality of your jokes… and in fact they are more likely to laugh at you repeating a knock knock joke you heard in the sixth grade than whatever sarcastic remark that pops into your mind.
- You’ll see that women don’t appreciate the concept of “cool” the way men do. Women would rather you take the stick out of your ass and act in a fun silly way than stand around like you’re a big shot.
- Playground humor never gets old. Never.
Women want you be around a guy that allows them to have fun. The next time that you are out with a woman and engaged in a conversation with her, make it a priority to take the conversation back to the playground.
As you are talking to her, imagine that the two of you are a couple of nine year olds on the playground during recess of school. Begin acting in a manner congruent to this.
Use things like the “Mouse race”
With the mouth race you take a pen and tell the woman that three mice are having a race, a blind mouse, and dumb mouse, and a deaf mouse. You put the men pen to arm and say “here is the blind mouse, tell him when to stop” and you start drawing. She’ll say stop right away. Then you say “here is the dumb mouse, tell him when to stop” and you start drawing. She’ll say stop right away. Then you say “here is the deaf mouse, tell him when to stop” and you start drawing. This time when she says stop you keep drawing. She’ll say stop again. And you’ll keep drawing. If she doesn’t get it… look at her and say “he’s deaf, he can’t hear you.” And keep drawing. By now you’ve drawn a line up her arm.
This is something completely stupid. Something that was funny in 2nd grade. But for some reason, it’s funny all over again.
It’s always good to have a few of these little games ready. You never want to do more than a couple of them as they will get old. But by doing a one or two you show the girl that you’re the kind of guy that doesn’t take himself too seriously and who she can have fun around.
She’ll appreciate that a lot more than that witty ironic observation you spent an hour perfecting the joke in your mind.
Remember, take her back to the playground.