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Question of the Week … brought to you by our friends over at Leftos:
The infamous “whisky dick”…
I can’t even count the number of perfectly good hookups that were cut short because of this unfortunate problem. For those of you unfamiliar with the term “whisky dick” it is slang for that embarrassing and awkward situation where we drink too much and can’t get an erection. I covered the topic of having trouble getting hard in great detail in an earlier post, but since this is a problem that plagues many more men that care to admit, I thought it was worth tackling again.
So the question is:
“What do you guys do when you get ‘whisky dick’ and can’t get hard?”
Here are some of the ways I have personally handled the situation, but I’d love to hear feedback on how some of you have handled it.
1. Pleasure Her
I usually know immediately if I’m not getting it up, and as soon I realize this I put my focus on pleasuring her. My game plan usually becomes pleasuring her to the point she is too exhausted for sex. You wouldn’t believe how well this works.
Most girls have an easier time climaxing from oral sex than vaginal, so they are more than willing to let you spend as much time as you like down there. Once you suspect she has climaxed you can wind down the foreplay and act like you’re too tired for sex. She’ll be more than satisfied and usually won’t press you to continue.
2. “No condom”
If I realize that I am not going to get an erection before I’ve gone to pull out a condom, I’ll usually claim that I don’t have any condoms. This allows me to avoid sex under the pretense that I refuse to have sex without protection (far from trueJ). Most girls respect the fact that you’re so responsible about using protection that they won’t question it.
Some girls will still want to “please you” in other ways. To avoid the embarrassment of her knobbing on my limp dick for an hour I’ll usually tell her that I can’t climax from oral and that it will only leave me with “blue balls” and we’ll just have to wait till next time.
3. “It’s too soon”
You get the “Chump of the Year” award for using this line, but sometimes it is the only way to save face. If it is a girl I’ve just started dating and I’ve yet to have sex with her, and I do NOT want our first time to be plagued with my trouble keeping it up, I would simply say, “It’s too soon.” But be warned…
While I’ve never used this line for “whisky dick”, I have used it once when I came before getting it in her and I wound up having to date the girl three months longer than I wanted to because she thought my withholding sex was because I really liked her. If she only knew…
4. The “Little Engine That Could…”
If I can hide the fact that I’m not hard from her for a bit, usually at some point I can manage to get hard enough for sex (As long as I don’t have to wear a condom.) I find in this situation it is a “mental game”, sort of like jerking off for the third time in a night. Sometimes you just have to find that perfect fantasy that wakes your dick back to life. So, yes, if you’re willing to keep trying, often you’ll get hard enough to have mediocre sex. If the girl is as drunk as you are she probably won’t know the difference.
5. Be Honest
This is probably my least favorite way of handling it. The only time I do this is when there is no alternative. Sometimes a girl is just too eager for sex that she won’t take no for an answer. In this case, you might just have to bite the bullet and be honest with her. Here is the thing: most girls have experienced this before. “Whisky dick” is common. And any girl that has had a boyfriend for awhile has undoubtedly faced times when he couldn’t get it up.
So simply saying “I’m way too drunk to perform tonight” usually lets her know the deal.
It is embarrassing, but you can usually recover from this and have another opportunity.
Do any of you have any more creative ways to handle the situation?