About the Author
“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.” – Bruce Lee
As an avid action movie fanatic and lifelong martial artist, the legendary Bruce Lee has always been an inspiration to me. Initially I was captivated by his high flying kicks and nunchuka skills, but after delving deeper into his myriad of interviews and written works, I’ve found that Lee’s philosophies go beyond just fighting.
Many people think Lee was just a kung fu master, but in reality, he studied many different styles, integrating techniques that worked for him and aided in his quest to become as efficient of a martial artist as possible.
Lee’s philosophy of Jeet Kune Do, often referred to as a style without style, has the practitioner abandon the old mindset of sticking to just one discipline and having them open their minds to, as Lee put it, “Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.”
The principles set out by Lee focus on a constant evolution of one’s skills, a mindset that anyone looking to get better at game should adopt.
“Obey the Principles without Being Bound by Them”
When the PUA community started to explode in the early 2000s, the Mystery Method and systems similar to it reigned supreme. Going out to clubs wearing outlandish accessories, saying ridiculous openers and using bizarre jargon to break down interactions became the telltale signs of the pick-up artist.
As time went on, many different styles of game branched out as followers of the old methods became tired of these cold and calculated approaches. It is safe to say that, today, a less scripted method of pick-up is taking over as the popular mindset as current students of self-development focus more on making their game “natural”.
If Bruce Lee dabbled in PUA, he’d say that both styles are flawed, yet, have an immense amount of useful information to take in.
Critics of the old school PUA tactics say using scripted lines and a step-by-step system are useless and don’t work which, to a degree, is correct, as incongruent and unnatural behavior will kill approaches. However, having rehearsed lines and break downs of situations can be a real benefit as they provide not only a safety net but also serve as a map for newbies to navigate these unfamiliar social situations.
Knowing what negs are, being able to tell when a girl is interested and knowing how to calibrate the vibe when dealing with certain sets are some invaluable skills that few guys would know how to do naturally.
Using Lee’s philosophy, these skills can be integrated with the current overarching “natural” mindset. Those who study pick-up do not need to choose one style of game over another but should find what techniques and tactics work for them.
There is no need to follow each step of a certain method, but there is no reason why a man can’t use various lessons they learned in conjunction with other styles and a natural mindset. With new methods and gurus putting out e-books every day, find what techniques work for you and cultivate your own unique and successful sense of game.
“To Hell with Circumstances; I Create Opportunities”
Bruce Lee had the uncanny ability to break down his opponents’ weaknesses in order to find the best manner of attack. He did not fly into the fray with a flurry nor did he sit back and wait for his opponents to hit him.
Lee knew how to create the best opportunity to attack, not letting any arbitrary disadvantages dissuade him from victory.
As any dating instructor will tell you, there is no such thing as a perfect moment. A woman is not going to tell you to approach her or go in for the kiss. These opportunities are created.
Just because it seems like an approach may be too difficult because she’s in a mixed set or the music is too loud doesn’t mean that you can’t spark attraction. You need the self-confidence in order to ignore these hindrances and create that “perfect” moment yourself.
Having faith in your abilities is half the battle with the execution just the physical manifestation of the expression of oneself. Like I said in my last piece, diving straight in and talking to women regardless of the circumstances is key. As Lee said, “If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.”
If you truly want to get better at picking up women, then you have to forget about waiting for the right moments and should instead live in the present, creating your own opportunities regardless of the situation.
Constantly evolving, remaining true to yourself and having faith in your own abilities are invaluable lessons from Lee that anyone can use.