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If you’re dating a younger woman, you’re probably used to receiving comments about her being a gold-digger. You may think she’s genuinely interested in you, but there’s usually some truth to the stereotype.
Why is she really with you?
When you see a hot young thing hanging off the arm of an older man, you can bet she’s not there for his good looks. It’s a strong possibility that she is with him because he is more financially secure than men her own age. There’s nothing wrong with dating a gold-digger if you can afford it and if you recognise the situation for what it is. The warning signs are fairly straightforward: she’ll never offer to pay for things, she’ll give you hints about things she wants you to buy her, and she’ll use sex as a reward. Enjoy being with her while it lasts- she’ll leave once her wardrobe is filled with designer clothing or she finds someone who is willing to spend even more on her.
Why women like older men
Hopefully there’s more than your bank account which is attracting her. Women often like men a few years their senior- older men have had more practise at relationships. They’re already made mistakes and learnt from them, so are often relaxed and down-to-earth partners. You want to really work this angle when you’re with her- don’t try to act her age, as your maturity gives you an edge over other men her own age.
You’re not her father
While the company of a mature man is enjoyable, don’t start trying to lecture her on the ways of the world. A younger woman will be more naïve than you, but you giving her advice will not help that. Life lessons are learned through experience, not by being told. Moreover, she will find your unwanted advice irritating and paternalistic.
Don’t be Daddy with the credit card either, unless you’re willing to accept that she’s only with you because she likes the lifestyle you can give her.
Treat her as an equal
You may be divided by ten years of life experiences, but don’t treat her like she’s stupid because of that. Don’t act like she’s a child by taking control of all of the decisions, even simple things like where to go to dinner. Ensure you ask her about her opinions and thoughts- which men her own age that she’s dated probably have paid less attention to. No healthy adult wants to be babied- she may be a bit younger than you but she is perfectly capable of thinking for herself.
Conversely, don’t expect her to act your age. She’s not in the same stage of her life as you are and she will act differently accordingly. Sometimes she will do irresponsible things, but you can’t expect her to act your age, for the same reason she can’t expect you to act her age.
Treat her opinions respectfully without trying to impose your age on her, and you’ll avoid one of the biggest problems of dating younger women. You want her to respect your wisdom and sophistication, without making her feel inferior to you.