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Why You Should Never Be Nice To Women


Below is a letter I got from Ross Jeffries. Ross always has some points
worth reading.

Why You Should Never Be “Nice” To Women! by Ross Jeffries

Dear Speed Seduction® Student

Many years ago, when I was first making my tv talk show rounds, someone asked me, “What do women want?”

I said something that nearly caused a riot in the studio audience. “Only an idiot would care what a woman WANTS.”

I paused dramatically to deliver the rest of it over the shouting that erupted, “A smart guy only cares about what a woman RESPONDS TO!”

You know, I wasn’t kidding about that. I meant it then and I mean it to this day.


There is what women SAY they want.

There is what women THINK they want.

Then there is what women ACTUALLY RESPOND TO!

Only that last one counts.

Now, in that regard, one of the more frequent questions I get is, “Does Speed Seduction® require me to be “nice” to women? Your patterns sound a lot like old-fashioned romantic “sweet talk” and I don’t want to be pegged as a sweet, “nice” romantic guy.”

Let me say this right now: I have NEVER said you should be “nice” to women.

In fact, most “nice” guys are boring as bat-shit, self-pitying whiners who are too out of touch with reality to see that what they are doing just doesn’t work.

And rather than change, they blame the women.

So let me draw an important distinction here:

There is “nice” which women do NOT favorably respond to.

And then there is “pleasant” which the sane, self-respecting women LOVE.

(I won’t get into the women who want to be hurt, abused or punished. I do not personally use nor will I teach how to use the language of abuse. You can go to my competitors to learn that)

A “nice” man only knows how to be agreeable. He doesn’t know how to challenge women and he can’t or won’t set the lead. And he filters everything he says through the belief that women are fragile little flowers who need to handled with OH so much care lest they be broken. YUUCH.

One more thing: women don’t trust his communication because he just won’t dare say anything that might offend them.

Now a pleasant man is something quite different: pleasant is power, held in proper restraint and exercised with precision and elegance. A pleasant man will speak his mind, set the lead, but he also knows how to listen and show the proper degree of interest and respect.

He may put himself first, but he also genuinely cares for and cares about his woman (or women). They are of great importance to him as long as they treat him right and work within the rules that he has made very clear.

Most important: his world is his own. He never, NEVER makes the WOMAN his world, around which he orbits. He does allow her to come into his world and occasionally even be at the center WITH him.

When you get these distinctions you will move into a powerful life with women.

You will never be “nice” again.

But you will also never have to bully, beg or buy.

Peace and piece,


About MikeStoute

Michael Stoute here, and at your service. I am a writer/editor/lover and a fighter. My words are weapons of wisdom so watch out, you may learn something...or better yet, maybe you can teach me something! Have a question? Please try to leave it in the comments, it will get a faster response than an email. Otherwise, Email Me

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Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.


  1. john

    February 2, 2008 at 8:45 pm

    don’t blame women blame yourself. if your not where you need to be with women its a good idea to start learning what your friends/parents/teachers failed to teach you and improve. overly nice guys never get anywhere and i love how this article elaborates on that. be pleasant, be alpha lol.

  2. Seraf24

    February 27, 2008 at 2:19 am

    You also don’t want to be a complete ass hole. Had my project ask me to print stuff for her, which I did. I had to balance this favor with all the teasing and balls busting I’ve been doing to her.

    Like Ross says, she responds well to them.

    I’m just not sure if she’s attracted. She’s given me a couple of IOIs, but ultimately she finally revealed the boyfriend line to me (despite her myspace saying she is single)


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