Big Send’s “Most Memorable Pick-up Story”
The second in our series of “most memorable pick-ups” comes from long time blogger Big Send. This is his original story from The Adventures of Big Send. He followed up the story with a new reflection one year later.
“I am no longer a stranger in the ways of women” by Big Send
I started out this night after I got out of class and called up my wing 4Five6 and talked to him about going out tonight. Ulysses (other good friend and wing) mentioned that he wanted to join in, and I always love hanging out with him so I was excited to start going out.
First I had to buy some parts for my new DVD player, so I tell 4Five6 to drive my stranded ass to Radio Shack in exchange I will try my best to explain Disqualification Theory (or Neg Theory).
Now, I am loosely doing the StyleLife challenge and he has a day on Disqualification Theory, which I think is very brilliant, but a bit confusing for someone new to the game. 4Five6 is pretty new so I tried to explain Disqualification Theory as best I can while he drove me around and I told him (as I stated in my last blog post on being a flirt) that you can study Disqualification Theory, then go out and sarge, and realize that the whole time you actually didn’t understand the Theory and then you’ll re-read it and come closer to understanding.
In a nutshell, I tell 4Five6 that a proper neg will first get a girl a bit self-conscious (like if you got rejected from a job at an interview), then she’ll start to seek validation and approval to make up for the disqualification.
After that, we meet up with Ulysses at a local bar in my area and I get a couple beers and tell 4Five6 and Ulysses that I will do negs today, no matter what.
First neg set:
I am standing outside on the bar patio, leaning against the door when a hottie walks right past me, back to me, and asks some guy on the street for a cigarette. So I say to her “Wow you totally cut me off, it will never work between me and you, I can’t be with girls like that” (And I said it genuinely, but with a light hearted smile)
And my God, she did exactly what was predicted! First she seemed a little self conscious, then asked “ohh why not? What’s wrong?”
That drifted off, I didn’t go farther with that. But just seeing her face and her reaction was eye opening enough
Second neg Set:
I go over to the bar a few minutes later and order a drink, New Castle. I sit next to a girl and she kind of accidentally bumps me with her elbow and I go “Oww, jeeze that hurt, you know you can really hurt someone like that” and she just laughs
But then I neg her 🙂 I say “Oh you are that type of girl, I already know it won’t work out I can’t date girls like you”
Then it was silence. I didn’t continue (in retrospect you should neg then switch topics, but I didn’t here) I just sat and waited for my drink…. but then! She opened me again, very energetically! So we talked for a good 10-15 minutes, just shooting the shit, vibing (I honestly don’t remember what we were talking about as it was just sharing a vibe). But she ended up ejecting my set because her friend (an UG) was alienated-she was with a friend and we were ignoring her so Grace just went back to her friend.
At that point, I get up and look for my friends and I see them in a fun set a bit down the bar. I join in and immediately introduce myself and make some fun comments about the new girl’s tattoos, and then we are off! Ulysses wasn’t digging the girl and he ended up leaving so it was just she and I and we just flirted the whole time with very gentle negging.
I used negging like “Omg you like blah-blah-blah, I can’t talk to you now” and made it seem real gentle and fun, and she was touching me, and I was doing the same to her. I was surprised at how well I could keep the conversation going, as my post on Being a big flirt is getting more and more real, whenever the conversation died down, I’d look to the environment for inspiration. I.e. on the TV was bicyclists and I said to her “Ya know, Armstrong is probably the greatest name ever for an athlete, I mean come on ‘Arm’ and then ‘Strong’ its like a joke! Hey did you know that Lance is actually a big cheater? I heard his heart is 3x the size of a normal persons….blah blah blah”
Hell I don’t even know if that is true, I just kept the conversation lively. Hell I was even joking about interest rates and the GDP.
(I have to say, as a side note: I read this on the StyleLife board and it really opened my eyes. It said that when under stress, a person is unable to speak 100% because the linguistic part of the brain is silence, so say a Lion was right outside your cave 100,000 years ago, you wouldn’t make a peep
So, focus on not being stressed and you will naturally talk more! It 100% works for me!)
After about 15 minutes of pure attraction, I up the kino escalation by saying to her “Hey lets look for our friends” so I take her arm-in-arm and walk around the bar looking for them. I can’t find them, so I use Mystery’s line “that okay, we’ll find them later so what did you want to be when you grew up, etc etc blah blah” and I just keep flirting with her and qualify her a bit, not too much. I didn’t need to.
Eventually we find my boys outside and chat with them outside and just keep up the flirting. Ulysses then does the phone routine on us and makes us take a picture together and tells her to kiss me. Thanks!! That changed the stage from flirting to an understanding that we will hook up, it was sort of known.
4Five6 disappears and I am actually a bit apprehensive about hooking up with her, not sure why but I am kind of a lover and not looking for a one night stand, but fuck it. Anyway, she offers me a ride home since I can’t find 4Five6, but eventually I do find him and we sit in booth at the bar and we just rest there, her sitting between my legs and we are just quiet and wait, building TONS of comfort.
So eventually we end up going back to my place, she drove and we continue vibing. We get out into my apartment and sit on my balcony and then we slow the pace, look into each other’s eyes, we continue talking… then ours eyes meet for a good 5 seconds. I keep the frame, keep looking, move my head forward a bit, then she comes in and we start making out and feeling each other for a good 15 minutes. Then I say to her “Wow this view is amazing, check it out” and the view really was amazing.
Then I recall her mentioning that she smoked weed earlier in the night, so I ask her if she still smokes and she’s like “yeah, I have some in the car!”
Nice!!! So we blaze on the balcony, but we don’t make out, we just enjoy our touching and feeling and I get into my spaced out stoned conversations and that was cool.
Now that I am stoned, I tell her I need to listen to some music. So we go into my room and she sits on my lap and I put on Mahavishnu Orchestra (John McLaughlin), which is unique Indian-World Fusion Jazz, and the drums and bass are intense, it really had a sexual vibe to the music, or maybe I was just very horny.
So now we are standing and the rest is history (Fuck you guys, this isn’t a Sex Story blog! Details end here :))
Now, even though I have been with a bunch of girls, before this night I haven’t gotten over Last Minute Resistance. This girl has 0 LMR which was awesome, and I lost my virginity to her while listening to John McLaughlin and The Mahavishnu Orchestra! Haha my favorite music!! (Disc 16 of the Montreux Concerts).
Man, fucking a girl is kind of crazy, I am 20 years old and have only seen pornoes and heard roommates fucking here and there. Me cumming inside of a girl is kind of amazing hehe.
At 7:30 AM she left, as she is a 2nd grade teacher and had to go to summer school. Bye bye!
Not sure what is going to happen with her, we didn’t make a deep connection, it was just purely physical. I don’t feel any attachment at all, after Eve (the girl awhile ago) I feel like my skin has gotten a lot thicker.
It is now November 12th, 2007. Its been over a year and here is my reflection on this report..
Whoa just finished reading it and all the memories came rushing back. It’s funny, I forgot most of our interaction in the bar, just remember us interacting at my apartment. I am also glad I re-read some of my old advice, I can re-use it now!
Other than that, I was a virgin then. I sucked in bed, but if she were here now, I’d fuck the shit out of here and that would be that. Probably would have played it better and converted her into a Fuck Buddy or something. I realize this girl really gave me a lot of second chances because I remember being literally nervous. Oh well
I think a big part of this is forgiving myself for the mistakes I made. Though I did fuck her, I messed it up and never saw her again afterwards. She had no clue she took my virginity. That is okay though, I didn’t want her to.
All in all, not a whole lot to add. In the end, it was just another night that I happened to pull in. So guys, keep going out there enough, and you’ll find a girl who will want to fuck you regardless of your game level. After all, this is a numbers game, so if I can do this, you can do it too!
About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.