How to Make a Direct Opener Work
A direct opener is a way of starting a conversation with a woman in which you express immediate interest in a woman and an”indirect opener” is one in which you conceal your interest in a seemingly innocuous question or statement, e.g. asking a woman her opinion on something or commenting on a particular situation in some way.
Debates have raged on whether it’s better to use direct or indirect openers when approaching women. I don’t care for debate. I do what I enjoy and what works best for me.
I prefer to be direct most of the time because it requires less cognitive energy for me and it suits the rest of my interactional style. That said, I know a lot of guys that are amazing with women and use indirect openers most of the time. It’s all about personal preference.
If you want to try direct openers, or are using them but find that they’re not working as well as you had hoped, then this article will help you.
Direct openers can work in most situations so long as you get the fundamentals right. Most men will find it easier to apply the following fundamentals in the daytime, e.g. approaching girls on the street or in bookstores, but they can work equally well in bars and clubs (it’s often just harder to get the fundamentals right).
Here are the fundamental things to be aware of when using a direct opener.
1. Have strong body language
If you slouch, place your hands in a supplicating position (e.g. with your palms facing up) or avoid eye contact, she will immediately think you are a low value man. Concentrate on pushing your chest out, keeping your shoulders back, holding your head high and moving at a slow pace at all times; especially when you are delivering the opener.
2. Have strong speech
The most important things in your speech are to slow it down and include pauses. If you rush the whole opener out immediately, it sounds like you’re afraid she is going to run away before you have a chance to finish. Include pauses for dramatic effect between parts of the opener, e.g.
– Excuse me… [pause] I just saw you walking past… [pause] and I had to come tell you… [pause] your outfit is incredible. Also, don’t raise your voice at the end of the sentence; it sounds like you are supplicating if you do.
3. Compliment something specific
It’s very easy to tell a woman she’s beautiful but it takes a high value man to notice the specifics of what is attractive about her. A man that pays attention to detail in the first few seconds is normally a man that pays attention to her in bed. You will generally do best to compliment a woman on her style, her hair or her body language. Use unusual words that most men probably wouldn’t think of using in a compliment, e.g. “elegant”,”graceful” or “alluring”.
Here are some specific examples:
About Soul Soul is a lead instructor with Love Systems, formerly The Mystery Method corp. He is the pioneer of Daytime Dating, a method that teaches men to meet and attract the women of their dreams, anytime and any place. He believes in real connection, deep love, amazing sex and having 100% integrity in everything he does. You can catch him on a Day Game Workshop or read about his adventures and thoughts on his blog www.lifewithsoul.com