Date Night Documentaries
Dinner and a movie is about the most common possible date scenario most all of us can imagine. A movie is about the most easily accessible form of art that you can actually plan an evening around while still leaving the house. However, once you get to your local multiplex, staring you in the face is “The Last Airbender,” “Twilight” or “Magnum P.I.: The Movie.” Then you realize that watching one of these or staying home and watching the Food Network probably aren’t that different. At least with the Food Network, once the show is done your conversation would start off with something like, “That looked good.”
Occasionally though there are movies that will make you think that the art form is more than remaking TV shows or children’s books. That’s really true with some of the documentaries that are out now and I’ll explain how they would make the perfect date movie.
“Worst Movie Ever.” Does your girlfriend think you should be making more of your life? Like becoming a lawyer or doctor or dentist? Then, take her to see this fantastic flick about the movie “Troll 2.” The movie follows around the lead actor George Hardy between times when he is a dentist and the times when he goes to sci-fi conventions to sign autographs for being in possibly the worst movie ever. She’ll never think being a dentist is cool again.
“Exit Through the Gift Shop.” Does your girlfriend think your hobbies are weird? What if your hobby was filming every moment of every day of your entire life? What if you stopped sleeping so that your filming could include street artists at night? After this movie, even stamp collecting will seem like a good way to spend some time.
“Babies.” Yes, this film is entirely about babies. Yes, your sack will probably crawl back in your body cavity in protest as you watch this. Two things: one, women love babies; two, women love babies. I would ask, “Which would you rather see, babies playing with goats in their native land or babies being stalked by Predators?” but I think we all know the answer to that. Trust me on this one though: women love babies that aren’t being hunted.
“Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work.” Ok, if you see one film about a powerful female comedienne who is over seventy this year, well you get the rest. It’s a great look at a woman as she tries to keep her career and life going full speed ahead, even while the demand for her talent wanes. The dirty jokes she still tells in her stand-up routine make the whole thing worthwhile for you, while you can look good to your date by seeing a show about a strong woman.
“Restrepo.” This would be the most challenging of all the documentaries. Ninety minutes of life filmed at the most dangerous outpost of the Afghanistan war. But, it really gets to the bottom of what it means to be a soldier. At the end of this one, you and your date will be able to carry on a conversation all about thanking servicemen for what they do for our country.
Even during the brain dead summer season, you have options to turn on your brain for a couple hours at least. If it’s too much, you can always go back to “Salt” and just gaze for a couple of hours at Angelina Jolie, but tell your date it’s for the suspense, darn it.
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About Jason McClain Jason is an aspiring novelist, which means there is a lot of time to put off writing and watch baseball or go fly-fishing, hiking and traveling. By "a lot of time", Jason means "procrastination."