Must-Read: Good Sex from the Female’s POV
Men! Women! We’re different! And we have orgasms differently!
One of the best ways to succeed in anything, whether it’s advertising or writing or sales, is by putting yourself in the shoes of your audience, figuring out what they want, and then delivering. It’s this shifting point-of-view that’s important, and where it gets tricky. How, after all, can you actually get out of your own head and into someone else’s? There are two ways. You can actually have experience from that point-of-view; for instance, if you’re in sales, you know what you’d want from a salesperson, so it’s easy. But when it comes to getting the female point-of-view for sex, that’s a little more difficult. You’ve never been a female and don’t own a vagina. So you have to look elsewhere. Hence, this list of tips over at AskMen.com.
Here’s tip one:
1- Think like a “knob,” not a “switch.”
When comparing male and female sexuality, there’s no shortage of adages: “Men are like light switches — just flip them on, and they’re ready to go. Women are like knobs — you can turn them up and down.” Or as Dr. Emily Nagoski writes in the Good in Bed Guide to Female Orgasms, “Men are like driving standard transmission — if you move through the gears in the right order, you will get where you want to go. Women are like baking a soufflé — the outcome depends on the ingredients and the chef, sure, but it also depends on the reliability of the oven, the altitude, the humidity of the day… more variables, more variability.” In short, think of foreplay as a 24-hour experience that happens both in and out of the bedroom. Sex is all about context. And while it may take very little to rev your engine, remember that she probably needs to simmer.
Way more important stuff available at the above link. Check them out, gents!
About Rick Mosely Rick is the editor for TSB magazine.