3 Dating Rules To Live By
Although the idea of a “same night lay” is tantalizing, most of the time when you meet a girl you like you’ve got to hang out with her a bit before you get up to any monkey business … so it’s very important that you handle yourself properly on dates to build upon what you have already started rather than destroying it.
So today I have compiled a list of dating rules to live by to keep you on the right track!:
I always recommend meeting up with a girl for drinks rather than going out to dinner for a host of reasons. However, this can become problematic if you love booze.
It usually plays out like this: At first everything is cool. You meet the girl, she looks good, you order some drinks and start talking. Ten minutes later your hand is on her knee, she’s smiling at you seductively and you drained your first cocktail, so of course you grab another round. Then over the next hour and a half you “accidentally” suck down five more. When you get up to use the men’s room you feel a bit wobbly… uh oh! Drunk again…
From here any number of things can go wrong. You might spill your drink on her, say something crude, be too forward physically or if you are an aggressive sort of dude you might get in a fight with another bar patron. More likely though she’ll just see that you are having a hard time keeping it together, and lose attraction for you. None of these are good and this is why you need to watch your drinking on dates. I’m not a big drinker so I usually keep it to three drinks max, and I drink full bodied beers like Guinness because they fill me up so I can’t pound them as easily.
Many guys make the mistake of trying to be cool and mysterious on dates almost like they think they are James Bond or something! Obviously the intention is good, you want to be perceived as attractive. However, from my experience girls just don’t respond as well to aloof guys as you might think. So rather than trying to stay distant to attract her, work on getting closer to her so that she can feel an emotional connection. Instead of being Mr. Cool be Mr. Warm! This is critical if any type of intimacy is going to take place.
There are a number of things you can do to be Mr. Warm. A few of my favorites include giving her lots of good eye contact, using warm body language and lots of touching, and sharing childhood stories to show your gentle side mixed with teasing, and sexual framing.
Obviously if you are meeting up with a chick you like you have an idea of where you would like things to go. However, obsessing about the desired outcome is counterproductive because it takes you out of the moment. So rather than focusing on how you are going to get your girl back home and into your bed, focus on the reality that is unfolding between the two of you in the moment. It’s not like you are going to forget to invite her back to your place if you stop thinking about it temporarily!
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About Jake Vandenhoff Jake Vandenhoff is a dating coach and author specializing in self-development and online dating. He offers an array of programs to help guys succeed with women naturally, without relying on outdated PUA tactics. His Online Dating Playbook offers step-by-step instructions for meeting girls online, and connecting with them authentically. Visit www.jakevandenhoff.com to claim a free copy of Jake's Online Dating Secrets eCourse.