How Much Should You Pay To Have A Girlfriend Each Month?
My bros and I have a joke that we have a “girlfriend payment,” that is we reserve a certain amount of cash to blow on our gf’s every month. It’s a joke because when you’re a single bro, you can pretty much go an entire month and not spend hardly any money on entertainment if you wanted to. But the reality is, if you have a serious no-bullshit girlfriend, you gotta peel a couple of benjy’s off the stack to invest in the relationship.
For the record, I do not view spending money on a girlfriend as paying for sex or companionship. I also don’t view it as her being a golddigger or anything like that. I’ll happily budget money each month to go out, go on vacations, and general entertainment.
Back in the day I read a lot of PUA material and most of it suggested you should NEVER spend money on chicks, ever. I think that’s shortsighted and crazy. If you’re a regular cool dude and you have a great girlfriend, you’re spending money. That’s the reality for the vast majority of us.
The reason is you’re investing in experiences with each other, and experiences are the foundation of relationship growth. If you’re not having cool experiences every month, you’re either stagnating or going backwards.
Okay, so how much is the right amount? My rule of thumb is the girlfriend payment is roughly equivalent to a car payment, and the car payment should be something you can afford. Thus, if you can afford a $350 car payment, that’s your starter budget. If you can only afford a $200 car payment, you shouldn’t be spending more on your gf. $50 a week is really nothing if you consider what it costs for a dinner for two. It’s a bare minimum.
If you’re lucky, you’ll find a girlfriend who naturally offers to pick up the occasional dinner or entertainment tab. My girlfriend pays for 30-35% of our entertainment, and that works perfectly for me. She has a great job and offered to pick up tabs early in our relationship, which was a pleasant surprise. I’ve dated plenty of chicks who expect the guy to pay for 100% of all entertainment. That’s brutal, but sometimes it’s the reality. I usually ditch those chicks.
Ladies, if you’re reading this and you have a job: you should pick up some of the entertainment expense. Do NOT force your guy to pay for everything. That will create a lot of resentment and ultimately be destructive.
On the flipside, guys, it’s your job to pick up the majority of the entertainment expenses. Don’t let your girl pay for everything because that will emasculate you. Suck it up and set aside your girlfriend payment.
If you’re really hurting for cash and you have a girlfriend, try to incorporate a bunch of cheap or freebie experiences during the month just to keep things moving along. As a last resort, cop to having “too much work” and cut down on entertainment for a month. Use that sparingly because it won’t work for long.
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About Lance Lance is a tech geek by day, social artist and fitness enthusiast by night. He specializes in relationships in real life situations, such as workplace and in business, and his goal is to create high value social circles filled with opportunity. For more on his dating and relationship perspective, check out his blog honeyandlance.com