4 Serious Red Flags to Look Out For in a Girl
There are never any guarantees when it comes to meeting new people, especially in the dating world. We’ve all had that experience where someone seemed totally normal and then turned crazy on us even a couple months down the line. It’s impossible to accurately interpret every single signal that women give off (because sometimes we’re not even sure what we want), but here are some serious red flags to look out for.
While most of us are actively trying to be the best version of ourselves, the victims of the world tend to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and assign it to outside sources that they don’t have control over. The train is always late, that cashier was so rude, this workload is impossible, that guy is driving slow just to piss me off. Victims choose stress instead of letting things slide. This is a real red flag in a woman because not only can a victim be a bit of a downer to hang out with, they also don’t fight fair. Hint: She’s going to blame you for everything. It’s your fault. Forever.
It’s fine to want to take care of your girl a little bit, but there’s a big difference between a woman who can make room for a man in her life and a woman who can’t control her life without one. You’re not the babysitter. Watch out for girls who can’t hold onto jobs, can’t hold their liquor without disastrous consequences, can’t pay their parking tickets, and can’t seem to handle basic life things like getting to the airport without having their hand held. Most of us are perfectly capable humans who don’t want to be treated like children. If she’s too needy with her energy it’s just going to be a drain on you and her cute damsel in distress act is going to get ugly real quick.
It’s normal to have an annoying coworker, but if your new girl keeps going off about how everyone at work is always ganging up on her, leaving her out of things, and making her life a nightmare, this is a major red flag. Yeah, we probably are leaving her out because she’s a complete pain in the butt. The last thing we need is another bitchy “friend”, so if your girl seems to have issues making or holding onto other girl friends it’s not for nothing. Double red flag if she has a lot of unresolved past relationships, be it boyfriends, parents, or friends. Sure she’s hot, but can you really hear a story about her and Becky fighting over nothing every single day without losing your mind?
Planning things and being controlling come from completely different motives. It’s wanting to hang out vs wanting to throw an invisibility cloak on you so another woman can never look your way again. If it’s only your second date and the girl is trying to completely dictate where you’re spending your weekend and who with it’s not a great sign. The beginning of a relationship is the getting to know someone stage, not the let me build my ideal boyfriend stage. This can be sort of tricky to spot because in its mild forms control can just come off as major interest, which of course everyone is into. We like attention. But if something feels a little off about her intensity, then there is probably something a little off. If you don’t listen to your intuition you might end up like your buddy who said: “I don’t know what happened, she just started calling herself my girlfriend and never left.”
About Kate Ferguson Kate Fergus is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blogs and online magazines. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce.