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When she doesn’t realize you’re flirting

Flirting

You are pulling out all your clever lines and flirtatious moves, and she does not even notice, much less respond. Does she genuinely not notice that you are flirting?

Don’t kid yourself, she does know

Do not get too ahead of yourself. Just because she is not responding to your attempts to flirt, does not mean that she is oblivious to your flirtation. Chances are that she is fully aware of what you are doing, and chooses to ignore it to avoid an awkward situation. It is easier to pretend the problem is not there and wait until it goes away.

If, for some illogical reason, you decide to confront her about her not realising you were flirting, of course she is going to profess innocence. She will pretend that she had no idea, because it is just easier that way. It is a kind way to let you down.

She’s not into you

Even in the rare case that she is not ignoring your flirting on purpose and genuinely does not notice, you are unlikely to have a chance. If she was actually into you, she would be looking for signs of you being interested in her.

Let’s say she is not sure if you are flirting. If there is the slightest hint to her that you are being suggestive, she will pounce on it. She will take the chance that you are flirting with her and flirt right back. At the very least, you know she is not keen on you.

It comes with experience

If she is only just starting to discover men and dating, it is more likely that she is genuinely clueless. This could be due to youth, being a late bloomer, or coming out of a very long relationship. She is only just starting to find (or remember) how to interact with men in a flirtatious way. In the latter case, where she has been in a relationship for so long that she is unfamiliar with flirting, she may also be in the habit of turning a blind eye to men’s advances. She has not yet become comfortable with giving herself permission to flirt back, and may be used to having to pretend not to notice due to an overbearing boyfriend.

Are you flirting properly?

The least likely (but still possible) explanation for her being oblivious to your flirting is that you are not making it obvious enough. Perhaps she thinks you are just being nice. For example, if you hold open the door for her, most women will interpret that as a thoughtful gesture that you would do for anyone. Sometimes, a woman will assume that an extroverted man is gay, so she may not even consider that you are interested in her. However, this is certainly unlikely to be the explanation in most instances. Your first course of action should be to consider alternative explanations first. You may also want to improve your flirtation skills in general, not just on the particular girl you are trying to get with.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/

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