First Date Sex: What To Do Before And After
You may feel as though you’ve lucked out already. You’ve found a beautiful girl who you enjoy being around and are very much attracted to. You want her bad. There seems to be great chemistry between you. And as you prepare for the first date, sex at the end of it seems like a real possibility.
However, you may have worries because of all the nonsense that surrounds this topic. You have no doubt heard that most women believe that a guy will lose respect for them if they have sex on the first date. This way of thinking is old fashion and out of date. The self-esteem of the 21st century woman is not based on what a guy she’s just met thinks of her after a night of sex.
Indeed—and here is the first tip—don’t assume that your new crush doesn’t want it as bad as you do. She may have already made up her mind to have sex with you on the first date. In any case, it’s up to you to do all that you can to keep things going in that direction. Here are some tips:
1. Take your time.
Don’t rush through the meal. Don’t seem agitated and overeager to get through the night. Enjoy her company and the conversation. Nothing says you’re genuinely interested like a long and lively conversation.
2. Charm her.
There is a difference between kissing her ass and charming her. Charm involves subtlety, indirection, and spontaneity. Rather than just telling her over and over how beautiful she is and saying so in the exact same way, you should find moments to work compliments into the natural course of the conversation. Say something simple and witty, something that will make her blush, smile, or even laugh.
3. Have a plan.
Have reservations booked at the places you want to take her. If a movie is part of the date, I would advise getting tickets beforehand.
4. Make it about her, not you.
Turn your phone off. Pay attention when she speaks. Women like being the sole object of a man’s attention. You should also avoid making the conversation about how great you and your career are. She may be naturally shy when it comes to talking about herself, so you might have to draw her out a bit.
5. Don’t mention your ex.
This is pretty straightforward. Don’t even think about bringing up an ex-girlfriend.
6. Don’t get drunk.
You can’t expect to be at your best either socially or in bed if you’re half wasted.
7. Find her comfort zone.
This is a hard one. Inviting her back to your place is part having a plan. However, your date may feel more comfortable—perhaps from past experiences—with going back to her place. It doesn’t mean you’ll get the old blow off cheek kiss when you get there. It may just mean she prefers being on familiar ground during the first night of intimacy with a stranger. Try to find her comfort zone before the night closes.
What you do after sex depends on what you feel for her. If you were strongly attracted to her before, then you are likely to be just as strongly attracted to her after. Be natural about it. There is nothing wrong with showing your affections. Cuddle and linger a bit. If it’s a weekend date, make breakfast and coffee, or invite her out for a bite. And, yes, you should always call the day after.
Here is another list of things to do to get first date sex. There is some good advice in it. However, I think it’s better to form a total mindset about the evening. Rather than trying to remember a list of things to do focus on pleasing her. If your mind is on making the night enjoyable, doing the right things will come naturally to you.
Here is another article related to the subject: https://www.tsbmag.com/2011/08/19/relationship-after-sex-how-to-do-it/
About Christopher Reid Chris was born in Washington, D.C. and lives in Britain. He works as a blogger, essayist, and novelist. His first book, Tea with Maureen, has just been published.