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How to survive a long-distance relationship

long distance relationship

Does the couple that Skypes together, stay together? Not without a lot of effort and communication.

Strategies to manage a long-distance relationship and keep your sanity

Sometimes you meet the right person at the right time, but in the wrong place. Long distance relationships are incredibly difficult and require sacrifice. You should only consider entering into a long distance relationship if this person is really special to you.

Be clear on boundaries

Some long distance couples cope with their situation by enacting some unconventional rules. Setting up clear rules is important for all relationships, but especially so in a long-distance setup where you will both be craving intimacy. Is it okay to see other people? Is it okay to harmlessly flirt with someone at a party? Is it okay to have close friendships with the opposite sex? These are the questions you need to ask to avoid tears over miscommunications later.

Have a life outside of Skype

You miss your girlfriend, and you may be tempted to put your life on hold to have more time to spend chatting with her. In a long-distance relationship, your lives cannot be intertwined. You do not live together- having Skype on in the background does not count- so do not shun social events so you can go home and virtually hang out with her. You do not want to look back on this period of your life and regret that you were holed up inside, video chatting every night. It is unhealthy to ditch your social life for any relationship, let alone one which is taking place over Skype.

Know where it is going

A long-distance relationship with no end in sight is frustrating, and will feel pointless. Keep your morale up by having clear long and short term visions. You need to have an idea of when you can be together in real life. You also need to know when your next visit will be- it is even better if you always have the next few trips planned in advance (even if you have only earmarked dates and have not booked tickets yet).

Be romantic

Being romantic is quite easy to do, even from a distance. Try sending each other hand-written letters, care packages, little thoughtful gifts, and postcards from any travels. This will make her feel like she is not being deprived of the romantic aspect of being in a relationship. You could even set up “dates” on Skype, such as chatting while you watch the same movie.

Don’t idealise

It is so easy to build up your relationship as perfect when you do not see each other in real life. You will feel like you know each other inside out, but you do not really know a person until you spend a great deal of day-to-day time with them. You get along well and never fight? That is probably because it is easy to have a good relationship when you only communicate through chat. Be wary of declaring someone to be “the one” if you have never met, or if you have only met on holidays.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/

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