Bad news if you’re a bi guy?
We live in much more tolerant times when it comes to sexual preferences, LGBTQ rights, etc., etc., as evidenced by a recent survey conducted by Glamour that found that 63 percent of women feel that sexual orientation can change. Also according to the survey:
According to an interview Glamour conducted with 59-year-old Margaret, one of several women interviewed for the article:
I came out as a lesbian when I was 19. When I was 21 I started going to gay bars, and that’s where I met the first woman I had sex with. I was like, Oh god, yes! Eventually, in my late twenties, I joined a choir—that’s where I met my partner of 10 years. We stayed together until my late thirties; our relationship was great for the first five years, but after that we were just maintaining appearances, though I did feel connected to her two kids. I remember the exact moment I felt my sexuality shift. I was standing in our bedroom, and I just had this thought: I’m not lesbian anymore. It was like somebody had flipped a switch. So at 38 I came out again, this time as heterosexual.
However, according to the survey, 63 percent of woman also said that they would not be open to dating a man who has had sex with other men.
Does this stat represent an unfair double standard? If women collectively have bisexual interests, with a sizable percentage acting on them, then why shouldn’t they be open to their male counterparts?
Or does this stat represent harmless personal preference? Just because two-thirds of women wouldn’t date men who have had sex with other men doesn’t mean they’re intolerant toward bisexual men.
According to Yahoo! Health:
While these results indicate a double standard in how we view male sexuality versus female sexuality, they’re not exactly shocking. Even if sexual fluidity is indeed becoming more culturally accepted, thanks to deeply ingrained societal homophobia, hooking up with another dude is still typically seen as one of the least macho things a guy can do.
Joe Kort, therapist and author of Is My Husband Gay, Straight, or Bi? told Mic that he is “not surprised at all” by this study’s results, and that it serves as an example of how such rigid interpretations of male sexual orientation need to be challenged.
“Just because a man has sex or sexual interest in another man, [it] doesn’t [say] anything about his sexual orientation,” he said.
About Jordan Murray Jordan is a journalist who has written extensively about dating and lifestyle for multiple publications.