By: Bobby Rio
Do you know how to flirt?
Let’s face something…
Not all of us are funny. Sure, we pull off some one liner that impresses our friends from time to time, and occasionally we just “click” with a woman and have her laughing hysterically, but most of the time our sense of humor is just “average”… at best.
So what do we do most of the time?
If you’re like I was, then maybe you drag yourself out to a bar… and PRAY.
I would pray that I was “on” or that I would stumble upon a girl I just connected with instantly… so that I could avoid that anxious feeling I got when I searched my mind for something funny to say… and came up BLANK.
Maybe you had a friend like my buddy Leo. You introduce Leo to ANYBODY and within minutes he he’ll have them cracking up. He knew exactly how to flirt.
Girls could say ANYTHING to Leo, and he’d find a way to turn it into something they could share a laugh over.
Even as they were saying “you’re such an asshole…” they had been smiles plastered on their faces.
For years… I wanted to be Leo.
Then I came to a stark, depressing, and then ultimately liberating realization:
I would never be Leo.
I would never possess a mind that ALWAYS has some funny remark to make. My mind just didn’t work that way. And the more I tried to force it… the more BORING I became.
So I stopped forcing it.
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Here is are some flirting tips I learned as began to pay attention to more and more men who were successful with women….
Most of them aren’t that funny.
Most of them have an average sense of humor just like you and me.
The difference is they don’t depend on being “funny” to flirt with women.
They naturally understood something that took me years to figure out…
…Flirting isn’t being “funny.”
Flirting is communicating with a woman in a “sexual” way.
And there are DOZENS of ways to do this…
In fact, a whole lot of “sexual communication” can take place without you ever even opening your mouth.
…Smiling at a woman at just the right moment is flirting.
…Letting a woman catch you checking her out is flirting
…Winking at a woman right in middle of her telling you off… is flirting
In fact, 3 of the biggest factors in flirting have absolutely nothing to do with what comes out of your mouth.
I still remember the night this clicked for me.
I realized that a subtle glance, at just the right moment, says more than any words possibly could.
Let me tell you a story that demonstrates some of these flirting tips.
I was standing near behind an extremely hot woman waiting to order a drink. She was sipping a mixed drink from astraw. Something made her laugh and she blew into the glass and the drink poured out.
I wanted to talk to this girl so I desperately searched my mind for something witty to say. I drew a blank.
So instead of forcing something unfunny or awkward, I waited for the exact moment she looked up at me and our eyes met, and simply shook my head back and forth and gave her one those looks that says “Can’t take you anywhere.”
She then turned to her friends and started chatting with them. I squeezed in to order my drink. My mind, still trained to make the same mistakes I talked about earlier, is now racing to find something funny to follow up with.
While the bartender was handing me my drink, one of her friends turned and asked me some question. I then turned into the group of three girls. I said something that made the group laugh. I then caught eyes with the one I was interested in and gave her subtle look that said “don’t spill it this time.”
The girl was a little tipsy. Not stupid drunk, but buzzed enough to know she was a little drunk. Later in the conversation she starts telling me a story about something that had happened to her the night before. She is excited about the story and talking quite fast. She trips over a word or two.
I then give her a look similar to the Rock’s eyebrow raise. Not a blatant eye brow raise, but a look that says “you lost me sweetie.”
She then slapped my chest and said “stop it”
And its on.
What I learned during that interaction was that flirting is just as much non verbal as it is verbal.
There were three key factors I discovered about how to flirt that night that quickly took my game to the next level. And I want to share these flirting tips with you:
Every interaction has a beat. And once you learn to get in tune with the beat of an interaction, your social intelligence will appear to sky rocket. The great stand up comedians have mastered the art of timing. Rent videos of some of the all time greats… and study how they use timing.
When the woman at the bar spilled her drink I waited for the right moment. I didn’t rush to make a comment, making my interest too apparent. And I didn’t wait until later to use it as a joke. I simply waited for the inevitable moment that our eyes met, and subtly shook my head. She smiled.
And the dance began.
I hope by reading this you’re encouraged to go out there and create these “sexual communications” with women, without waiting for the perfect thing to say.
Flirting with women is a skill you must learn if you want to seduce them. But, there are more than one ways to skin a cat. These are some of the best flirting tips I can give you.
I highly recommend you check out Make Small Talk Sexy where I give further flirting tips, and give many verbal ways to have more fun, flirtatious, and sexual conversations with women. It will give you a crash course education in how to flirt.
Now when you talk to a woman in a way that attracts her you’ll begin to notice that women will:
If you want to see a sample of some of things you’re going to learn read though “How to Talk to Women:Make Small Talk Sexy”
The one thing I want to leave you with is: Learning how to flirt and get good with girls, so that you can attract them, get the kiss, get them back to your bedroom and close the deal… it’s easier than you think.
Hope you enjoyed these flirting tips.