Yahoo Groups March 23 2006 “Got number without building rapport or time bridge”

Message: 1
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 09:36:02 +1100
From: “Hart, Simon”
Subject: RE: 3 openers

>>How about using some questions from your reporter drill? And phrase them
in such a way as to promote conversations. Pick the ones that got good
reactions from girls.

I did that last time I went out and for some reason it did not go down well.
Why? I can’t really say. I will give it another shot though. I’m going to do
Styles Jealous girlfriend opener I think, or some variation of it.

S

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Message: 2
Date: Wed, 22 Mar 2006 23:31:29 -0000
From: “hotdamnmale”
Subject: Help: got number without building rapport or time bridge

hey guys i’m an rfc and i need help… i just got two numbers .. (
i’ve been forcing myself to talk to at least 3 girls a day ( for the
past 6-7 days) i’ve gotten at least a few 5-6 min convo.. one of them
i was actually at a library’s opening … we toured the library
together with me making silly comments but generally not building any
kind of rapor.. the funny thing is that she played along and followed
me whenever i went until i decided we should sit down ( i didn’t
really invite her.. thinking she whould just do so.. ) anyway when she
said she had to get going i just asked her her number… ( seems like
she gave me house # not cell)
my question ..how can i go about building raport over the phone .. i
know up to hi my name is ….. what next … how do i build a phone
game until i can get a date… ( and hopefully build more rapor on
that one)

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Message: 3
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 10:07:41 +1100
From: “Hart, Simon”
Subject: RE: The Naked Self

>>Simon, You rock bro. No laughter here, just admiration.

Cheers. The reason I’m doing it is to help others, as well as motivate
myself. I do NOT want to be writing about how AFC I am in 12 months. There
may be guys here who GET SOMETHING from reading about a dude who is going
through similar shit to them rather than reading ‘how to do it’ books and
being unable to do it. And everything I write on that blog is gonna be REAL.
My real experience and my real insights that come out of it. I see myself as
some kind of guinea-pig for all this PUA knowledge that is out there, this
‘industry’ that has sprung out of it. Like DOES THIS STUFF REALLY WORK? Can
I REALLY change my life?

Have any of you guys ever seen the movie OFFICE SPACE by Mike Judge? Well
I’m currently exactly like Peter of that. I’m at the START of the movie. I’m
so much like that dude I nearly cried when I saw it. My art director is
nearly EXACTLY like Lumbergh too.

I personally find this to be interesting; like the part I enjoyed MOST about
THE GAME by Neil Strauss, was the very first bit when he was AFC. Once he
was kicking ass it was sort of like reading about a Hollywood star instead
of reading something I could relate to.

S

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Message: 4
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 02:22:33 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Re: Help: got number without building rapport or time bridge

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “hotdamnmale”
wrote:
>
> hey guys i’m an rfc and i need help… i just got two numbers .. (
> i’ve been forcing myself to talk to at least 3 girls a day ( for the
> past 6-7 days) i’ve gotten at least a few 5-6 min convo.. one of them
> i was actually at a library’s opening … we toured the library
> together with me making silly comments but generally not building any
> kind of rapor.. the funny thing is that she played along and followed
> me whenever i went until i decided we should sit down ( i didn’t
> really invite her.. thinking she whould just do so.. ) anyway when she
> said she had to get going i just asked her her number… ( seems like
> she gave me house # not cell)
> my question ..how can i go about building raport over the phone .. i
> know up to hi my name is ….. what next … how do i build a phone
> game until i can get a date… ( and hopefully build more rapor on
> that one)
>

Focus on continuing the fun conversation(loop back) you had in person
and then invite her to MEET you. Make it EASY for her to say “Yes” to
this offer. If she can’t (or won’t meet you), under no cirqumstance
must you act as though you were hurt or upset. It’s not a big deal. If
she says “No”, does she make a counter offer or give you a lame excuse?

For example, you can say after you’ve talked for a while…Hey Deb,
I’ve gotta go now (you always end the convo first) but I know this
really cool place in XYZ, why don’t we meet for a cup of coffee (or
drinks) and continue our conversation?

That’s it. Keep it simple and easy for her to say “Yes” to this
request and KEEP IN MIND that the purpose for this conversation is to
get her to meet you in person and NOT to seduce her over the phone.

What’s YOUR plan?

Warmly,
George

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Message: 5
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 05:13:45 +0000
From: “chris claridge”
Subject: RE: The Naked Self – Office Space & seduction

That’s funny.
I actually have a “comparable” story in the business sense.
It can be translated to seduction.

To make a long story short:
One of my NY Resolutions was not to let any more corporations dictate my
life & happiness (as well as become a full-fledged pothead, & frequent the
beach at LAX to watch planes take off over the pacific).
So now I’ve got this “I don’t care” attitude……or “I care, but not that
much”.

I do eBay from home, and do VERY well.

I’ve gone eBay “Consultant” freelance, and I have multi-million and
billion-dollar companies pecking at my resume on Monster, and howling to
have me come on board full-time as their eBay Director.
I WON’T DO IT —- and the funniest thing is when I come in to interview or
make the suggestion that I will be a “Consultant” with an exit strategy, I
am hammered with “what can we do to get you to stay”

Funny, just like women……..when you act indifferent or kind of a d**k,
interests peaks on the other side.
When you act like a wuss, they grind the heel on you.

So, with that being said, those of you still stuck in the corporate grind,
watch Office Space, play Tetris, eat some Cheetos, and tell your boss you’ll
do it later.
The cream always rises to the top — life is meant to take risks, you can
do better.

I’ll be visiting your website frequently Simon — thanks for sharing.

>
>
> >>Simon, You rock bro. No laughter here, just admiration.
>
>Cheers. The reason I’m doing it is to help others, as well as motivate
>myself. I do NOT want to be writing about how AFC I am in 12 months. There
>may be guys here who GET SOMETHING from reading about a dude who is going
>through similar shit to them rather than reading ‘how to do it’ books and
>being unable to do it. And everything I write on that blog is gonna be
>REAL.
>My real experience and my real insights that come out of it. I see myself
>as
>some kind of guinea-pig for all this PUA knowledge that is out there, this
>’industry’ that has sprung out of it. Like DOES THIS STUFF REALLY WORK? Can
>I REALLY change my life?
>
>Have any of you guys ever seen the movie OFFICE SPACE by Mike Judge? Well
>I’m currently exactly like Peter of that. I’m at the START of the movie.
>I’m
>so much like that dude I nearly cried when I saw it. My art director is
>nearly EXACTLY like Lumbergh too.
>
>I personally find this to be interesting; like the part I enjoyed MOST
>about
>THE GAME by Neil Strauss, was the very first bit when he was AFC. Once he
>was kicking ass it was sort of like reading about a Hollywood star instead
>of reading something I could relate to.
>
>S
>
>

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Message: 6
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 00:04:44 -0600
From:
Subject: Re: Re: Help: got number without building rapport or time bridge

You dont build rapport over the phone. You do that in person. I am not a big
believer in telephone conversations. I think most AFC are still stuck in their
preteen/teen years when it comes to phone conversations and stressing over what
to say over the phone. When we were kids, (AFC Kids) talking on the phone was a
rite of passage…it was something that you did with that favorite girl. You
must move on and away from that frame. Real seduction is done best in person
(although i confess i like emails). I use the phone only to prequalify and
prescreen potential dates/seduction victims. If i get your number (and that is
not as big a deal as it once was with the advent of caller id and cell phones)
my plan is to get you alone to spin game on you. I call to set up dates (usually
the first one is something simple like meeting for coffee or for drinks, no
dinner, movie, drinks etc). If i call and get an answering machine and no return
call, i MAYBE make one more attempt and then i am out! If i call, and talk and
attempt to set a date, but get static (“im washing my dog on that day”)once
again, im out…

look, u got the number, call her, talk a few minutes about the library BS, and
then say, “hey, lets meet at a Borders for coffee thursday at 7pm sharp!” you
know she likes books, etc, etc, then build the rapport when you see her live and
in person!
> —– Original Message —–
> From: George
> To: seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com
> Subject: [seduction_dating] Re: Help: got number without building rapport or
time bridge
> Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 02:22:33 -0000
>
>
> — In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “hotdamnmale”
> wrote:
> >
> > hey guys i’m an rfc and i need help… i just got two numbers ..
> > ( i’ve been forcing myself to talk to at least 3 girls a day (
> > for the past 6-7 days) i’ve gotten at least a few 5-6 min convo..
> > one of them i was actually at a library’s opening … we toured
> > the library together with me making silly comments but generally
> > not building any kind of rapor.. the funny thing is that she
> > played along and followed me whenever i went until i decided we
> > should sit down ( i didn’t really invite her.. thinking she
> > whould just do so.. ) anyway when she said she had to get going i
> > just asked her her number… ( seems like she gave me house #
> > not cell) my question ..how can i go about building raport over
> > the phone .. i know up to hi my name is ….. what next … how
> > do i build a phone game until i can get a date… ( and hopefully
> > build more rapor on that one)
> >
>
> Focus on continuing the fun conversation(loop back) you had in person
> and then invite her to MEET you. Make it EASY for her to say “Yes” to
> this offer. If she can’t (or won’t meet you), under no cirqumstance
> must you act as though you were hurt or upset. It’s not a big deal. If
> she says “No”, does she make a counter offer or give you a lame excuse?
>
> For example, you can say after you’ve talked for a while…Hey Deb,
> I’ve gotta go now (you always end the convo first) but I know this
> really cool place in XYZ, why don’t we meet for a cup of coffee (or
> drinks) and continue our conversation?
>
> That’s it. Keep it simple and easy for her to say “Yes” to this
> request and KEEP IN MIND that the purpose for this conversation is to
> get her to meet you in person and NOT to seduce her over the phone.
>
> What’s YOUR plan?
>
> Warmly,
> George
>
>
>

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Message: 7
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 08:06:21 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Re: Help: got number without building rapport or time bridge

Hi Michael,

Just a few quick comments for the benefit of the group…

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, michaelchina@… wrote:
>
> You dont build rapport over the phone. You do that in person.

And the purpose for the conversation is to get her to meet you in
person. And you do that by making that first step very easy for her to
comply with. This is throughly field tested. If you want a
“scientific” explanation, see Cialdini’s work on Influence and
compliance in particular.

> I am not a big believer in telephone conversations. I think most AFC
>are still stuck in their preteen/teen years when it comes to phone
>conversations and stressing over what to say over the phone.

Not just AFC, trust me on this one. I’ve talked with guys who can be
considered pretty good with women who have made the same mistake over
and over because the girls they were talking to were so HOT. Instant
brain override! Fight this urge because this is highly likely to turn
you into just a friend.

>When we were kids, (AFC Kids) talking on the phone was a rite of
>passage…it was something that you did with that favorite girl.

Very true. But now and for at least next six months in the
relatinship(if you DECIDE she is qualified), your attitude has to be
rock solid. Later, if you must, you can call her just to chat but even
then please, please keep it short.

>You must move on and away from that frame. Real seduction is done
>best in person (although i confess i like emails). I use the phone
>only to prequalify and prescreen potential dates/seduction victims.

The phone is good for that…and I suggest we get them to qualify
themselves to us before we even call them on the phone.

HypnoBill and I had a discussion about this and he came up with two
questions which can help anyone determine how successful they’re
likely to be with the woman they’re talking to.

I have just one “Who is qualifying whom?” Group, read this question
again and REALLY think about it. It will help you tremendously and
BUST her frame in one fell swoop!

So, use either HypnoBill’s two questions or the one from me and you’ll
know what the score is as long as you don’t kid yourself.

>If i get your number (and that is not as big a deal as it once was
>with the advent of caller id and cell phones) my plan is to get you
>alone to spin game on you. I call to set up dates (usually the first
>one is something simple like meeting for coffee or for drinks, no
>dinner, movie, drinks etc). If i call and get an answering machine
>and no return call, i MAYBE make one more attempt and then i am out!
>If i call, and talk and attempt to set a date, but get static (“im
>washing my dog on that day”)once again, im out…

Agreed. It’s really simple…if she WANTS to go out with you (you’ve
done you JOB well in person) she’ll MAKE TIME and create opportunities
to meet you.

>
> look, u got the number, call her, talk a few minutes about the
library BS, and then say, “hey, lets meet at a Borders for coffee
thursday at 7pm sharp!” you know she likes books, etc, etc, then build
the rapport when you see her live and in person!

Thanks, Michael. Excellent points.

Warmly,
George

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Message: 8
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 08:18:31 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Re: The Naked Self – Office Space & seduction

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “chris claridge”
wrote:
>
> That’s funny.
> I actually have a “comparable” story in the business sense.
> It can be translated to seduction.
>
> To make a long story short:
> One of my NY Resolutions was not to let any more corporations
dictate my
> life & happiness (as well as become a full-fledged pothead, &
frequent the
> beach at LAX to watch planes take off over the pacific).
> So now I’ve got this “I don’t care” attitude……or “I care, but
not that
> much”.
>
> I do eBay from home, and do VERY well.
>
> I’ve gone eBay “Consultant” freelance, and I have multi-million and
> billion-dollar companies pecking at my resume on Monster, and
howling to
> have me come on board full-time as their eBay Director.
> I WON’T DO IT —- and the funniest thing is when I come in to
interview or
> make the suggestion that I will be a “Consultant” with an exit
strategy, I
> am hammered with “what can we do to get you to stay”
>
> Funny, just like women……..when you act indifferent or kind of a
d**k,
> interests peaks on the other side.
> When you act like a wuss, they grind the heel on you.
>
> So, with that being said, those of you still stuck in the corporate
grind,
> watch Office Space, play Tetris, eat some Cheetos, and tell your
boss you’ll
> do it later.
> The cream always rises to the top — life is meant to take risks,
you can
> do better.
>
> I’ll be visiting your website frequently Simon — thanks for sharing.
>
>

Hi Chris,

That’s a great story! I too know from my experience that the attitude
“I care but not that much” works like magic in consulting as well as
in love.

You see, chumps may see you as a d*ck,sob,not a team player,
blah,blah, blah. Crybabies. But that’s really not the secret. The
secret is that you’ve put a high price on yourself and are congruent
with it, so the world pays YOUR price.

I can theorize as to WHY this works the why it does, but I don’t think
there is a need for that. It’s quite obvious that it works.

I’ll just say “People want what they can’t (or don’t SEEM to be able)
to have” and “Once people get a taste of something they truly want
and are in danger of losing it, they’ll work like hell to keep it”.

Well done!

Warmly,
George

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Message: 9
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 08:25:37 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Bouncing members?

Hey guys,

I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing those members
whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not reading the group and
therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.

Your thoughts?

Warmly,
George

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Message: 10
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 03:41:52 -0500
From: “tjeep”
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

please, at least we can keep track of the active members
—– Original Message —–
From: “George”
To:
Sent: Thursday, March 23, 2006 3:25 AM
Subject: [seduction_dating] Bouncing members?

> Hey guys,
>
> I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing those members
> whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not reading the group and
> therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.
>
> Your thoughts?
>
> Warmly,
> George
>
>

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Message: 11
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 03:35:28 -0800 (PST)
From: Chunwah Ho
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

— George wrote:

> Hey guys,
>
> I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing
> those members
> whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not
> reading the group and
> therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.
>
> Your thoughts?
>
> Warmly,
> George
>

That’s a good idea. I think it will speed up the
postings…just don’t remove my name accidentally LOL

Chun

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Message: 12
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 04:53:07 -0800 (PST)
From: Chunwah Ho
Subject: RE: 3 openers

— “Hart, Simon” wrote:

>
>
> >>How about using some questions from your reporter
> drill? And phrase them
> in such a way as to promote conversations. Pick the
> ones that got good
> reactions from girls.
>
> I did that last time I went out and for some reason
> it did not go down well.
> Why? I can’t really say. I will give it another shot
> though.

Hmm…I’m guessing it’s because of your energy level
or enthusiasm. Try to convey a more lively body
language or dominance when you approach. And also in
the beginning she will put up a shield. I know I get
that a lot so sometimes after my first routine it’s
like I just don’t want to go on. But don’t get
discouraged, it’s not really her, just her defense
mechanism.

I’m going to do
> Styles Jealous girlfriend opener I think, or some
> variation of it.
>
> S
>

Yep, that’s a good routine, but also prepare a few
more to transition into them.

Chun

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Message: 13
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 06:15:17 -0800 (PST)
From: Lee Remore
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

Delete them. It saves you TIME, and they won’t miss the messages. Maybe they’ve
just moved on…….?

Thank you for your time!

George > wrote:
Hey guys,

I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing those members
whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not reading the group and
therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.

Your thoughts?

Warmly,
George

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________________________________________________________________________

Message: 14
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 06:47:42 -0800 (PST)
From: “b.”
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

George wrote: Hey guys,

I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing those members
whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not reading the group and
therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.

Your thoughts?
======

By all means !!! I have several groups and weekly or so delete bouncers with
not a second thought. DO IT !!

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Message: 15
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 04:16:30 -0800 (PST)
From: Eek / nitainev
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

— George wrote:
> Hey guys,
>
> I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing
> those members
> whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not
> reading the group and
> therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.
>
> Your thoughts?

Normal policy is that anybody that bounce for more
than a week is generally fair game; there’s some
return of addresses that bounce for up to about 4
weeks, then there’s virtually none (maybe 1%
reappear).

That’s from running fairly large (200,000 members)
mailing lists, and experimenting around this. It’s
some years ago, though.

-Eek

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Message: 16
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 01:34:35 -0800 (PST)
From: “Erikk .”
Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

What do you mean by bouncing? Their e-mails are invalid and you get a
“undeliverable” message when you write to them?

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Message: 17
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 15:24:34 -0000
From: “varun”
Subject: People come into your life – MUST READ

Pay attention to what you read. After you have finished reading it,
you will know the reason I sent this to you. Here goes:

PEOPLE COME INTO YOUR LIFE FOR A REASON:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that
person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a
need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you
with guidance and support, to aid you physically,
emotionally or spiritually. (or for you to offer the same FOR or to
THEM). They may seem like a godsend and
they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then,
without any wrongdoing on your part or at an
inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the
relationship to an end. Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to
take a stand. What we must realize is that our
need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The
prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to
move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has
come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may
teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it
is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must
build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you
have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your
life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a
season or a lifetime.

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Message: 18
Date: Thu, 23 Mar 2006 17:19:09 -0000
From: “David Caswell” Subject: Re: Bouncing members?

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “George” wrote:
>
> Hey guys,
>
> I’m thinking about cleaning up the list and removing those members
> whose emails are bouncing. They’re really not reading the group and
> therefore I feel comfortable with deleting them.

George, some of the people are probably reading the group, but their
mail provider is sending out faulty bounce messages. On the other
hand, anybody can get a gmail account that works for free (just email
me) so I say drop them.

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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences.  For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.

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