What to Leave on Voicemail to a Girl
This Pickup Arts newsletter deals with the dreaded voicemail. It is actually some practical advice for those that fear leaving voicemails when calling girls for the first time.
Leaving Good Voice Mails by Jay Valens
Have you ever called a girl for the first time, got her voicemail, and didn’t know what to say or if to even leave a message at all?
For you guys with our DVDs, “The Art of the Pickup”, it’s likely you are getting a lot more phone numbers than you’ve ever had before but are now running into the issue of follow-up and how to deal with the dreaded voicemail. We cover follow-ups a lot in the main DVD but here’s some additional advice in regards to voicemail.
First of all, it’s not so bad.
Well… for MOST guys it IS bad, but not for readers of TSB Magazine!
Example of a bad voicemail to leave a girl
First, let me tell you what kind of messages most guys tend to leave on a girl’s voicemail. If you recognize any of this as being the type of messages you used to leave, feel free to cringe:
“Hi Bertha, it’s Bartholomew. It was really nice meeting you yesterday and I was wondering if you’d like to get together and do something sometime? Give me a call back when you get this. My number is 555-666-7777. Talk to you later. Bye.”
For those few of you who actually got calls back after leaving such messages, I congratulate you on your ability to luck out on the lottery on a pure fluke.
The fact is, a typical girl who gives out her number to many guys will hear that kind of message so many times it almost becomes comical to her… but mostly pathetic. If she replies to it at all, it will be on a whim or because the guy managed up to that point to do everything else right to totally attract her.
But here at The Art of the Pickup industries, we don’t leave such things to chance!
First, let me help you understand why that typical message is so bad:
– It smacks of desperation.
– It has a non-authoritative tone.
– It gives a vibe of uncertainly.
– It leaves her in control.
– It’s too polite (weak).
– Almost everything said is obvious.
It also depends on the girl to actually call back for the next step and that is BAD because girls practically NEVER call guys back even when they’re attracted to them. Did you catch that? They almost NEVER take initiative on their end to call back, even if they like you.
I wonder how many girls you waited on to call you back never did and then you gave up on them? Hmmm… maybe a topic for another newsletter?
Anyway, you may be wondering what kind of message to leave. You may think it takes an amazing story or magical words. Nope. All it takes is an easy-going tone and a few words: “Hey Bertha, it’s Bartholomew. I guess you’re not around. I’ll try you again another time.”
9 times out of 10, I get called back within a few minutes. Leaving any other kind of message, or not leaving a message at all, less than half will call back and some of them will take a while.
I’m not saying you’ll for sure get that 9 out of 10. But I am telling you that with all other things taken care of properly, and so long as she has SOME interest in you, she will more likely be responsive to that kind of message than the pathetic example I gave first or even other typical messages you may be used to leaving.
Now I will tell you WHY because when you understand WHY you are better off and will be able to apply that understanding to other situations with girls…
The first example, which most men seem to get stuck on, gives away all mystery and sends the wrong vibe: “I am pursuing you, I am interested in you, please get back to me, I’m like every other guy, now the ball is in your court.”
In MY version, there is no vibe of needy pursuit, an ambiguous interest, no specific request, and no similarity to all the other pathetic messages she gets from guys. It also keeps the control on my end because I don’t even ask her to call back, I vaguely state that I’ll try again “another time”.
When girls hear this kind of voicemail from a guy they just met and whom they might be interested in (they DID give their number to him) and he keeps control of the schedule and vaguely states “another time”, they wonder “When? What other time? Will he call back today? Tomorrow? What did he want?”
If in the chance she doesn’t call back in a reasonable time (within under a day), I can call back and it will not come across as my always trying to reach her because I maintained control on my end and did not send a vibe that I was anxious for her to call back. Usually if I have to call back, my message is even SHORTER and MORE laid back: “Hey it’s me. I’ll try again later.”
Part of the killer aspect of this kind of voicemail is the creation of curiosity, but what really solidifies its effectiveness is the casual easy-going tone. It also does not put the pressure on her to feel that by calling back she’s committing to something.
You can set up a meet with her AFTER she calls back or when you actually reach her, don’t do it on voicemail.
I’ve heard some guys give advice about starting an interesting story in a voicemail then cutting it off, with the presumption it creates curiosity. Sure, it might, but I have to laugh because women have good radars and more often than not it will come across as a ploy and most times when women sense a guy trying to pull off a ploy they associate it as unattractive behavior.
I hope this answered some of your questions of what you should leave as a voicemail for a girl.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Jay Valens Jay Valens & Ray Devans are the masterminds behind The Art of the Pickup plus the founders of the first & largest site dedicated to pickup, attraction & dating advice for men... Their [pickup newsletter] is top-notch & their advice caters to average guys worldwide, not just the young college or club crowd. They regularly answer subscriber questions & have one of the most amazing pickup learning tools around, The Art of the Pickup: Tactics & Techniques.