Social Backup Planning

I love these article from Sebastian of Master the Vibe. Another informative piece! Bobby

How Girls Do It: Social Backup Planning by Sebastian Drake


You know why girls are always so calm and unbothered about their

engagements? If they miss one, they’ve got six more lined up!


Most men hate this behavior. And I can’t blame them, really – but

if they UNDERSTOOD this behavior, they’d be able to plan

accordingly and use it to their advantage.


Before I go on – don’t do this to your male friends. Us guys have

fairly rigid, well known social codes about loyalty and making good

on your word. Women have social codes too – they’re just less

understood by men. But before we go on, this is how to potetially

deal with girls – I’d never social-backup a lunch meeting with a

fellow gentleman.


Now, when a woman agrees to go out with you, realize this: Much of

the time, they consider it as if it is a bid for their time. When

the time event in question comes around, all the bids are checked,

and the highest bid wins.


It’s not uncommon for some girls to book 3-4 (or more!) men at the

same time. Then they go with what they feel the highest bid is.


And men get… really discouraged when a woman doesn’t show up for

a date.


So what to do about it? Make social backup plans. Don’t consider it

dishonest or wrong, either – it’s “just how things are done around

here”. In some countries, you give money to officials to get travel

documents. Just a nominal sum – it’s “how things are done around

here”. Many Europeans are abhor that decent service comes with a

mandatory tip in the United States. Don’t be. It’s “how things are

done around here”. And despite the fact that it’s maybe not the

best system, it’s a decent workable system, and you alone, my

friend, can’t change it. So you can burn bridges and create ill

will by never tipping, or you can go with the flow and tip in the

USA. Likewise, dealing with girls, you can set yourself up for

failure by booking them exclusively, or set yourself up for success

by social backup planning.


Social backup planning: Having a backup plan available to you in

the event things don’t go well. This will mean less wasted time for

you in your life, and also make you more attractive to the women

you’re likely meeting. Let women know that you might have free time

– line 2-3 of them up, and send a “sorry, something came up – will

make it up to u” text message if you’re having a lot of fun on your

first date.


This must seem incredibly unpalatable to you, dear reader. In fact,

I hope it does. It’s not the way of men. When we make commitments,

they’re written in black and white and we don’t break them. But

many women have so many requests for their time, that they say

“maybe” to all requests and see how it shakes out. Just… maybe

sounds a lot like “definitely” when a guy really likes a girl. Or

maybe she doesn’t communicate herself well…


As you get more popular, you don’t even need to try to doublebook

girls. Just knowing that if you pick up the phone and dial, that a

half-dozen girls would jump for joy at the thought of cooking you a

meal and you taking them to bed that night – then you’re in good

shape. Just knowing that you’re not home alone if the plans wash

out means you’ll be much more calm and naturally make good

decisions when inevitably logistics hit a small snag and someone is

late. When she does show up, you’ll give her a nod – That’s right,

sweetie, you got the high bid in. I chose you from my options. Let’s

have a ball.


Social backup plan – like girls do. You’ll feel calm and unpressured

about if and when she makes it there if there’s a line out the door

for you.






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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences.  For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.

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