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Attack of the Killer Nothing

Below is another newsletter from the guys at Pickup Arts. It is all about dealing with rejection. – Bobby

Fear of Rejection is Nothing by Jay Valens

If pickup were a “natural resource” like oil or coal, we would all

be out there thinking we were depleting that resource every time we

talked to a new girl, tried a new attitude, or practiced our

communication skills.

In a world where everything seems to be for sale, even water, there

is a danger of thinking of everything as a limited resource. There

are even oxygen bars now! Yes, we live in a world where now air is

literally for sale.

In such a world, it becomes very easy to build up the mentality

that opportunities to meet women are limited and there is a risk of

“loss” of some kind if an interaction doesn’t pan out. Fear of

rejection or bad feelings will create a feeling that there is risk.

After all, for the inexperienced or hesitant, it does feel like

something is being risked.

The thing is, you can think of pickup like a natural resource, but

it’s a resource that’s unlimited, because when you try to meet

someone new, nothing is risked, nothing is depleted.

1. Rejection is NOTHING, it destroys nothing

2. Approaching requires NOTHING, it uses no resources and only

takes desire and action

3. Fear is a FEELING, and a feeling is not made of anything and can

be discarded

Part of what hold back guys from taking action to talk to a girl is

the fear of the unknown, not knowing what to say or do next even if

taking the first step, or the second, or the third. It is

literally, the fear of NOTHING.

Maybe this is part of what holds you back.

When you’ve run into a “stall”, it’s not like there is something

tangible lost or anything tangible that will be lost no matter what

happens. Nobody has put a price tag on your feet or mouth, and you

incur no cost to try something new, say something different.

You can choose to either give up or keep moving forward. If you

mover forward, it costs you nothing and no resource is depleted.

But if you give up, you do lose something – an opportunity and

additional experience.

Those are not tangible things either but they are FAR FAR more

valuable resources for your personal life than just about anything


It costs you nothing to push forward. It costs you a lot to give


Did I overdo this analogy just yet?…

OK, imagine you are a steam train… HA HA… OK I will spare you any

more of these analogies, I think you understand by now.

So, just realize when you’re confronted with hesitation, there

really IS “nothing” to worry about.

No go out there and meet some girls. There’s nothing to it…

Jay Valens

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About Jay Valens Jay Valens & Ray Devans are the masterminds behind The Art of the Pickup plus the founders of the first & largest site dedicated to pickup, attraction & dating advice for men... Their [pickup newsletter] is top-notch & their advice caters to average guys worldwide, not just the young college or club crowd. They regularly answer subscriber questions & have one of the most amazing pickup learning tools around, The Art of the Pickup: Tactics & Techniques.

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