The Process of a Seduction Step by Step
Derek Vitalio breaks down the process of seduction in this quick article.- Bobby
Seduction step by step by Derek Vitalio
Here I concretely lay out what weve covered to this point a step-by-step guide from meeting a lady to getting her in your bed. Follow these steps religiously and youll do tons better than the guy thinking God I want to sleep with HER! Guaranteed.
Where are we?
By now weve talked a number of times about the STEPS approach, how you need to focus not on bringing a woman home, but instead on going one further step down the path that will lead to intimacy.
Still, we havent specifically listed each step and some we havent even specifically stated. So before we unleash your new crazy powerful skills upon the world, lets make sure you know the path you want to walk.
The First Step
Have your place READY for a lady.
This doesnt mean you need some insane Daddy Mac love pad with the potion of seduction enveloping every little item and cranny. What this DOES mean is you need your place presentable at every moment.
When you step out the door, is it dirty? Do you have old socks or pizza boxes hanging around? Would you bring a girl back to your pad, given its current state?
If the answer is no, you need to work on that spatial hygiene. Now you dont need to be able to eat off the floor, but you do need your bathroom to NOT repel with its smell, your floor to be visible, and your general organization to be a cut above the mad professor.
Go too far and you look a bit like a neat freak “ but thats miles better than looking like a slob. The worst stereotype about neat men is they arent interested in ladies “ and hopefully, youll be able to prove to your targeted woman that isnt true within a few moments.
However, if you manage to elicit a ladys disgust factor (and everyone has theirs triggered by different things “ although generally, the closer you get to the toilet, the higher the risk) you can ruin a nights worth of work. Nothing like having your place be a deal-breaker.
So, take the time. Keep it clean. Always. You never know when opportunity will present itself. Be a boy scout and be ready.
Even better, have your showcase skill or some other interesting object(s) in easy view. If you play guitar, dont keep it in a closet, but set it up in your main room or bedroom in plain view. If you want to bring a woman over to look at art have the art book handy and displayed.
In other words, have the bait youre using to lure to your lair in easy reach. When you arrive to show off that new CD, it looks more natural and genuine if it isnt in the bottom of a drawer. If you want to show off your photo skills (one of my favorites), have your camera ready to go.
This isnt rocket science. Just have a place that wouldnt threaten anyone “ and hopefully lends itself to playfulness and interest “ and keep it that way. Easy. Still, plenty of people forget this, end a night prematurely because they arent ready to entertain, and never get another chance. Just dont do that.
Be Clean in Every Way
Take care of your own hygiene. Youd be surprised how often bad breath is the deal-breaker. In fact, an offending smell is one of the most unattractive things known to humanity. Chances are at some time or other in your own past it ended what would have been a beneficial connection.
So, considering we lose any sense or our own scent very quickly, its best to play it safe. Assume you smell awful, and take the necessary precautions. Brush teeth twice. Bring along some sort of breath saver (I like the film ones because theyre small and make no noise in pockets). If you sweat, wash, and if you cant wash, deodorize.
Cheap aftershave “ used in MODERATION “ can be a godsend.
As far as fashion goes, you dont need to be straight off a Paris runway. In fact, unless you have talent in this area, simple is the best way to keep it. A nice pair of chinos and a plain black shirt is PLENTY as long as you wear it with confidence.
Flashier things can you some attention, but before you put them on you want to be sure it isnt the wrong kind. Simple is fine. Really. Just look clean and fresh and youll have no problems.
Carry around an odor and stains and no matter how cool you are, your social value takes a dive and youre cutting yourself off from most women (hot granolas excepted).
Create the Attraction
Be playful and fun and extend your meeting. This can mean getting a number or email, shifting your locale, or any of a million other things. The main purpose here is NOT to bring a woman to bed, but merely to ATTRACT her. All you need be concerned with is getting her interested enough that she wants to spend more time with you.
Best to do it with your relaxed and playful attitude, but if time is short, you can get a number with little more than confident politeness. Dont worry about what comes later. Just get her into you to begin.
Lead her somewhere – together
Change locations. This can happen at the same time, or at a later date. This is where your scene-shifting skills come into play, where the fact that you are somewhere TOGETHER is both natural and enjoyable. If things are going well at this point you can shift quickly into physical contact, but at the least you should start introducing familiarities like hand-holding and relaxed (unpervy) touching. Youre building to a later point here, so dont try to take more than is being offered “ youll get turned down and likely lose a number of points, digging yourself a deep hole.
Just concentrate on establishing and strengthening your connection here. Again, that should be your ONLY GOAL. If want you really want is to sleep with this girl, fine. That comes later.
Dont be the shortstop who looks where the throws supposed to go and misses the ground ball. Stay focused on your contact with the lady. The rest will follow successfully.
Now youve established contact, and the lady is into you. What do you do? BRING HER HOME. Her place or yours “ whichever works with the seed youve created earlier (Have you heard the new Coldplay album?) Once you get her there, dont rush things “ shes already basically said shes interested in going further, but push too fast and youll turn her off and undo all the good you did earlier.
Instead, take your time here. In fact, if you wait just a little bit longer than shes comfortable with “ or play hard-to-get yourself (I dont think you get to sleep with me just because we both like Coldplay!) thats even more powerful.
Turn up the Heat
All you need now is the transition to PHYSICAL connection. Ah, thats always a great place to trip yourself up, isnt it?
Well, fear not.
If you want to learn how to transition to a physical connection successfully, check out my newest course, Seduction Science 3rd edition. This step as well as the entire process of seduction is broken down into an precise, step by step format that you can immediately implement right now into your game.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About MikeStoute Michael Stoute here, and at your service. I am a writer/editor/lover and a fighter. My words are weapons of wisdom so watch out, you may learn something...or better yet, maybe you can teach me something! Have a question? Please try to leave it in the comments, it will get a faster response than an email. Otherwise, Email Me