The Key to Successful Relationships
A hallmark of great relationships is that they grow stronger over time.
Most relationships slowly grow into boredom, apathy, and become a regular day to day grind. But great results come to the men and women who work together to build something even better. It takes effort and dedication, but the results are so worth it.
Here are some of the most counter-intuitive, forgotten points that you’ll need to take care of to keep your relationships great:
* Your Masculinity
* Your Dominance
* Your Independence
* Getting her more involved in your life
* Getting her to contribute more
* Constantly making her feel strong and sexy
* Making real, permanent strides and improvements as a man
It’s a paradox. Women do some things that might lead to a man getting “domesticated”.
And if the man does get domesticated, it’s bad news for the passion, fire, excitement, and strength of the relationship.
Roughly, domestication is an erosion of your masculinity, dominance and independence; turning you from a masculine, dominant and independent man into an immasculine, submissive, codependent man. This is bad news. You want to keep being the man she originally fell in love with.
Ultimately, you’ll want to keep doing the things that you enjoy, even if your friends stop doing them. Things like going to concerts, riding a motorcycle, playing some recreational sports – anything you think of as “guy stuff” you don’t really want to grow out of. If you’ll look at the most accomplished men in the world,
almost all of them have a childlike enjoyment of “guy stuff”. And believe it or not, women love guys who like guy stuff.
You want to take action – dominant, not domineering. Don’t ask for permission to do things you know are right. This doesn’t mean swing over the top and try enforcing your will onto others. It means knowing what’s right and taking action in that direction, not cowering from other people.
Finally, take time for yourself – you time. You need it. Time to cool off, do your own thing, relax and recharge. With a great relationship, you’ll recharge and feel better after having been with your woman, but it’s still good and healthy to get time for yourself. Make sure to do this regularly, don’t make every activity
and decision right down to the little things a shared decision.
Not getting domesticated goes a long way towards maintaining a healthy, happy relationship. Here’s some more things that might help:
Your woman is craving to get more involved in your life and goals -if you’ll show her how, if you’ll open up to her. Too many men “compartmentalize” their life into: Career, hobbies, mission, purpose into one box; Girlfriend, wife, family in another box.
That means if career, hobbies, mission type stuff are really taxing, the man gets resentful of calls to come home. It’s by intertwining them successfully that the man can be happy in both arenas.
Tell your girl about the things that you want to achieve. Ask her to do small things to contribute. Even small stuff – if you’re starting a new weight training regime, her giving you a back rubafter your lift weights, cooking you some rich high protein meals, and picking up some cans of tuna at the store for you are all small details. But they go a long way towards having you appreciate her help, and her feeling like she can make a positive impact on your life. Get her working the elliptical or running on the treadmill at the gym while you lift – lots of men actually report they can do more reps of heavy weight when a girl they like is there.
Get her more involved. Quality women who love their men also love to play a big part in making them who they are. They love to support their man and make him even stronger. In turn she becomes stronger herself.
Always make sure that she knows exactly how important she is to you and how much better your life is with her being a part of it. Everytime she is good to you, make sure you show her your appreciation. Kiss her, cuddle her, tell her how awesome she is, thank her for being so loyal and supportive.
Most men start taking their woman for granted over time – huge mistake. They stop complimenting her. They stop cherishing her. She feels less sexy and less strong over time.
Do the opposite – Tell your girl that she has played a big role in helping you get to where you are today. Tell her you wouldn’t be here without her. Tell her she’s sexy and awesome and amazing. Do this more as time passes.
Over time, as you have been with each other for longer and longer, you will both start to age. While you’re getting more worldly, experienced and wiser, there’s a good chance she’s starting to go into a panic, wondering if her looks are fading. Most women grow more and more insecure about her looks over time – meanwhile, you’re accomplishing more and more.
So you need to do something that most men do less and less over time – let her know that you think she’s beautiful, sexy, wonderful and amazing. Tell her specifically what you like about her.
Your relationship is going to be a million times healthier than the average relationship if she knows how important she is to you. If she feels beautiful and alive around you.
Most men take this stuff for granted – a major reason passion starts to fade away. By letting her know all the things you find great about her, she’s going to feel sexy, alive, powerful around you. By maintaining your masculinity, dominance, and independence at the same time, you remain a man she reveres and feels safe and strong around.
Finally – be aware that you need to be constantly improving yourself as a man. You are either improving or stagnating… You can’t sit still.
If you find if you’ve settled into a pattern for a while, pick up a new hobby or project to snap out of it. Join a recreational sports team, volunteer somewhere, start studying a great new game, start writing that book you always thought about writing, take up painting or jogging. Anything new and interesting.
The “meaning of life” doesn’t have to be static, and you don’t have to wait for a perfect calling before taking action. By trying new things and getting yourself off auto pilot every day, you’ll see that time actually slows down for you. You’ll live years in a matter of months.
You’ll know as soon as you hit auto-pilot that months flash by in seconds. Stay out of this state and get off auto-pilot. Always be pushing yourself and your woman. Test your limits and get out of your comfort zone by trying out new things and executing new ideas.
When you remain masculine, dominant, and independent, you stay a strong man – the kind of man your woman originally fell in love with. When you get her more involved in your life and your goals, she feels like she’s making a big difference with you and you appreciate and enjoy spending time with her. When you constantly let her know how sexy and awesome she is, she stays alive and vibrant around you. And when you do all that and continue to improve yourself, not getting stuck in a pattern of autopilot – then you’ve got a truly amazing relationship.
Oye – I know relationship skills took me a long time to put together.
Frustrating to be able to finally get girls, but not keep them!
That’s why we put together Master Your Social Destiny –
It’s THE comprehensive guide to having a strong, healthy relationship with a beautiful, quality girl. We aim to deliver so many epiphanies to you on relationships.
Thanks for choosing us, and wishing you health and happiness,
About Sebastian Drake One of the founders of Master the Vibe, Sebastian brings a background of public speaking and social science to Master the Vibe. He blends social science with his background as a writer and poet to help men use language to create unique, powerful, distinct personal images.