Sex and the Suburbs: Tumultuous Texting
This article has been a long time coming. I need to vent about a phenomenon that has greatly impacted the dating world. This phenomenon is known as the ‘text message’. By now I would venture to say that we are all pretty familiar with texting and its appeal/convenience. What better way to inform others of your estimated time of arrival, pose a quick question, provide an immediate response, text your friend during an important meeting or work event or simply send a dirty joke without even so much as a sound from your mouth? What’s not to love!? Surely, text messages have many benefits and I for one use it on a regular basis and LOVE it!
Well, as you all know, with all that is good comes a down side. In the case of texting, along with all its perks, this action can also have SERIOUS consequences. One downfall is that text messages lack inflection. So many of our conversations are person-to-person and we can detect one’s emotions from the tone of their voice. A text response can be very misleading in this sense. Just imagine the conversation below taking place on a telephone … then read it again as if it were a text message.
The scenario is a 3rd date with a cool, laid back chick you are totally digging. You told her that you are taking her out this Friday and to be ready by 8:00. She is totally psyched and has left work early to get ready (this entails a blow out and running to the mall for a hot new shirt) and be sure she’s set for you to pick her up. You can pick her up since it is the 3rd date … it’s now 7:15 pm on that Friday and you are running a little late, but hey, no worries …
Chic You’re Diggin’: “I am really looking forward to seeing you tonight.”
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “Awesome, me too.”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Is it casual. Where we are going?”
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “Totally – I’m wearing jeans and a button down. Listen though … I am still held up at Johnny’s so I may be a little late. We’re finishing up our draft pick. I should be out of here by 8:00 the latest. Is that ok?”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Ok, what time do you think you’ll be here?”
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “Not sure, but I’ll hit you up again soon.”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Ok…”
It’s now 7:55, you are still at Johnny’s and trying to hurry the draft along. It’s cool though … this chick you’re diggin’ is so laid back, she won’t mind. No biggie …
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “So sorry … I have to get 2 more players and then I should be on my way. Hope to be done in twenty minutes – 30 the latest. Cool?”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Yup … great.”
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “Thanks, talk to you soon.”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Yeah …”
8:30 pm: The draft is winding down and you are getting ready to head out for your hot date.
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “What up!? You ready? I’m about to leave.”
Chic You’re Diggin’: “Um yeah listen, maybe tonight’s not a great night to meet up. I am pretty tired anyway … maybe another time.”
Guy Hoping to Date Chick: “Oh ok. I’ll call you tomorrow. Feel better.”
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Jill Summit Jill Summit is a single woman who is not willing to settle for second best. She has dabbled in many crafts ranging from medical and behavioral science to holistic massage. More recently she has ventured into journalism to share some of those dating experiences. Whether it is a source of insight, advice or even entertainment, her efforts are to assist and empower men in todayâ€™s dating world.