5 Steps to Success with Women For 2012
Ah, the New Year. As 2011 comes to a close we can reflect back on what this year has given us. This year I’ve spent my first extended stay abroad, I’ve started my own business, and I’ve seen my first student experience his goal of meeting a woman he loves and getting married. Looking back, I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished so far, but I’ve still got a long way to get to where I want to be.
The new year gives us a chance to reflect back, but also to look forwards to 2012, and set goals. Goals allow you to plan to keep track of where you are going, and where you want to be.
Goals should be things which are true to our key, core value system; and measures of our success. Goals should be attainable, but just outside of our current reach. Setting goals allows us to grow and strive to improve, instead of becoming stagnant. Here are 5 steps to making sure you achieve your goals:
In order to achieve any level of success, it is important to establish goals. The problem is, most people just write down their goals and they collect dust, as the goals are never reached.
At New Years, I always set goals for the coming year; but I also have a list of monthly, weekly and daily goals that I am constantly reviewing as well. I review my goals each week with a good friend and we hold each other accountable. I take my weekly goals from my project list/monthly goals, and my project list/monthly goals from my bigger picture/yearly goals list.
Find a set time where each week you review your goals.
Reviewing your goals is critical to your success. But how exactly should you write your goals down, and how can we apply this to meeting women?
The way in which you track and review your goals is important, but it is equally relevant to record your goals in the proper fashion. You should write your goals down in a place where they are regularly reviewed. Write them down as if they have already occurred, in the present tense.
GOAL: I have an Asian girlfriend.
NOT: I want to get an Asian girlfriend.
NOT: I will try to get an Asian girlfriend.
Writing your goals in this fashion enables your brain to see yourself already experiencing that success, and shows you the path to reach that goal.
However, this is where people sometimes stop short. They write down the goal, but then they stop, and it never gets done. If you are going to take the time to write down a goal, make sure that you do it right, and that you have a purpose for doing it.
Whenever you set a goal, it’s important to have a reason that you want to achieve the goal, obviously. The purpose behind the goal allows us to see past the goal to the benefit achieving the goal will have on our life. Write a purpose for the goal directly below the goal.
GOAL: I have an Asian girlfriend (This is just an example, What is YOUR goal when it relates to women)
PURPOSE: Having a steady girlfriend balances me and allows me to live at my highest potential. Plus, cooked meals and regular sex aren’t so bad either. I find Asian women attractive. (THIS SHOULD BE SPECIFIC TO YOU)
It’s easy to say something or to set a goal and to not follow through. Humans enjoy the prospects of thinking about success, but sometimes have trouble taking on the action, risk and delayed gratification to achieve that success, that’s why its particularly important to have a purpose for each goal.
Now that we have a goal and a purpose comes the meat of the goal, the actions we will take to achieve the goal. I have an Asian girlfriend is a good goal – but it isn’t actionable.
ACTION: I will join an online dating site and send out 3 messages online per day I will only send out 2 messages before asking for her number. I will approach 1 attractive Asian woman per day and push to get her number. I will approach at least 5 Asian women per night when I go out on the weekend and try to escalate.
The more specific the action, the more you can measure your success. You can include multiple action steps. The action step is an important place to hone in your skill-set and grow in particular areas. If for example, you have problems escalating, maybe that is an additional to approaching women at night. Or if you prefer day game but you sometimes leave without the number, it might be good to remind yourself that you need to push for the number close.
The more specific your action steps, the more accountable you and someone else can hold yourself in step 5.
Again, human nature is to be lazy! After a few weeks, you might find yourself on a Friday night saying things like: “meh, I don’t really care, I’ll just stay in tonight.”
This is why it is imperative to get someone else, a good friend, a professional dating coach, a mentor, a wingman, ANYONE to hold you accountable to your goals. Offer them something in return and push each other to reach the next level. Set a regular time where you can review your goals and write them down in a place where the goals can be reviewed and tacked by both of you.
These goal setting techniques can be applied to any area of life, but if you want more women in your life, try setting at least one goal in this specific area. Make sure that you write your goals down in the present tense that that you include a purpose, and action step, and someone else to hold you accountable. Most of all good luck in 2012!
Learn more about Tim at Assume Attraction.
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About Tim Strong Tim Strong is a dating coach who enjoys world travel, and teaching men how to pick up women. Tim teaches a natural style of game and strives to integrate lifestyle design and self-actualization into the lives of his students. You can find him at Assume Attraction