Some Days You’re the Pigeon and Some Days You’re the Statue

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Accept Defeat and Move On

For the most part, calendars are the “I didn’t put any thought into this other than remembering you sort of like this sports team/movie/iconic celebrity from the 50s and figured you needed to know when Flag Day is” kind of Christmas present. Unless you’re too dumb to use Google Calendar or have a thing for unsightly wall art with stock photos, they’re pretty useless. The one I got from my girlfriend for Christmas, however, was thoughtful and enough to inspire this week’s inner game article.

One or the other

“Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit!” That’s not a request. It’s the name of the calendar. It’s a collection of country sayings, one of those joke-a-day tear-off types. Cheesy, but I love kitsch and it’s enough to provide for a chuckle a day. Lucky for me, I didn’t have to wait until April to get something out of it. The note for Monday, January 2 reads “Some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue.” Hardy har. While this little nugget is nothing I haven’t heard before (and not particularly funny), the sentiment it expresses ties in perfectly with the idea of inner game.

Confidence isn’t building up the biggest ego in the world and thinking you’re the best at everything. Face it. No matter how many things you’re good at, you probably suck at a million more. You might be an amazing athlete, brilliant artist, shrewd businessman, and get more game than Ryan Gosling at a convention for “The Notebook,” but still have no freaking idea how to cook, solve a Rubik’s cube, beatbox, tightrope, etc. It’s great to have ambition, but you can’t be the best at everything; there’s just not enough time in the day.

Confidence is knowing that the cards are not always stacked in your favor. It’s about being able to deal with everything from flat tires to unrequited love. Ever heard this before? “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…” Okay, so it’s a semi-corny, quasi-religious mantra used by twelve step programs, but the part about accepting things you can’t change makes perfect sense. Whether you’re an evangelical or think God’s about as real as Pam Anderson’s body, the ability to accept the metaphorical pigeon shit that life throws at you on a daily basis is key to keeping cool and remaining confident.

Accepting failure is not the same thing as quitting. Just because some woman dumps you for being a momma’s boy doesn’t mean you stop dating and move back into the basement. Acceptance is realizing you spend a little too much time talking about your mom’s bridge group during dinner and cutting back on such behavior in the future. You don’t have to cut mom out of the conversation entirely, but you can leave mom and son Saturday afternoon knitting time for the 10th or so date.

With a brand new year comes endless opportunity and a decent amount of bird crap. How you deal with the clean-up says a lot about your character and confidence. All you can do is buck up, move on, and make sure to wear a hat.

About John Brhel

John Brhel is a freelance writer from upstate New York that enjoys picking apart life's idiosyncrasies and listening to Huey Lewis & the News.

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One Comment

  1. John

    January 14, 2012 at 5:11 am

    I’m surprised I haven’t read this earlier. Great post. Please write more about your thoughts on how to improve confidence and self-awareness.

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