Must-Read: What Would Ron Swanson Do?

Right now, think up any current characters on TV shows. They can be on any of the big networks or a cable show. Now, think up the manliest characters that grace the small screen. Sure, there’s a handful of folks on Sons of Anarchy and maybe one or two guys on Boardwalk Empire and maybe Bates from Downton Abbey, just because he’s goddamn Bates. And now, as a final part of this exercise, throw them all in a giant ring together and have a mental Battle Royale in your head. And when the dust clears and you wipe all the blood and muck from your eyes, and there’s only one character left standing, who is it?

You’re goddamn right: Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec.

Swanson!

What some people don’t know is that Nick Offerman, the man who plays Swanson, is actually almost as big of a bad-ass as Swanson himself. To give you an example, read this call to action from Offerman himself about getting men to put back on a tool belt and making things already instead of just prancing about without any actual skills of any kind. Here’s a snippet:

Once you strap on a tool belt, the benefits become obvious. When your friends see the quilted maple blanket chest you made your wife for Valentine’s Day, they will both admire you and despise you, because all their wives will think you’re a champion. Proven fact: Women have a visceral reaction to a man who works with his hands. Flowers are a great gesture, but flowers in a handmade vase? Boom. Wood-burn a love note on the vase? Kabang. You’re a Viking. Prepare to pillage.

Truer words, etc. Make sure to read it all and then get out and be a goddamn man.

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About Rick Mosely Rick is the editor for TSB magazine.

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