Stop Stressing and Just Enjoy the Game
You know that dreaded, pit in your stomach type feeling you get when you really, really don’t want to do something? That’s the feeling I used to get when I started out in the game.
While I wanted to get with girls, pick-up felt a lot like working for a paycheck. The reward is worth it, but the process is just so grueling.
Back in the day, I used to stress about every little aspect of an approach or a date. Thoughts like, “Am I acting too needy?” or “When should I kiss her?” would constantly be running through my mind, ultimately hindering myself from staying in the moment and truly interacting with the women I’d meet.
Even beyond pick-up, I’d worry about the everyday stresses of life and constantly would be on edge.
As I began to progress through the game, one day I realized just how counterproductive this mindset was.
What’s the point of worrying about every little detail of a pick-up or letting meaningless daily distractions stress me out?
When I finally started letting go of the stress and just started enjoying the game, everything just fell into place. Not only were my interactions with women getting better, but my overall enjoyment in life increased.
Let’s face it, there are a million things coming at us every day and, the fact is, we can’t control most of it. Shit happens, move on.
I sometimes worry about a few of my friends who just let stress run their lives. For example, one of my best friends in the world, a really smart and funny guy who’s an avid bodybuilder, for some reason gets insanely pissed off in even the most minimal of stressful traffic situations.
If an old lady is driving too slow and makes him miss a green light, it’s not uncommon to hear my friend screaming obscenities or bashing his steering wheel out of place Hulk-style.
Now he’s not the only person in the world to ever experience road rage, as way too many people in this country are guilty of it (myself included), but this is just a prime example of how letting stress into your head can turn a sane person crazy.
There’s no reason to care about stupid shit like that. Instead of stressing out when there’s a line at Starbucks or when a car cuts you off, acknowledge the situation and move on.
Instead of freaking out when a girl doesn’t text you back or stressing out over mundane daily distractions, start enjoying life more.
Don’t make going out and meeting women turn into work, because that’s the last type of mindset you want to have. If you are just trying to find enjoyment out of life and are constantly producing positive emotions, women will pick up on that and will be attracted to it.
The best approaches I’ve had in my life all came when I wasn’t even concentrating on gaming girls.
Some of my most exciting pulls have come when I was just having fun and not letting meeting women and trying to take them home dictate my mind in a stressful manner. Instead, I produced my own internal enjoyment and found happiness in whatever situation I was in.
Taking girls home was just a natural extension of those great nights.
Way too many of my friends get stuck in their heads when they are talking to girls or trying to set-up dates. They always ask me advice for the perfect situation to handle this one specific girl.
Sorry to break it to you guys, but even with whatever advice I or someone else gives you, there’s always a chance that she will reject or break up with you. Girls have vastly different personalities so even with all the advice and experience in the world, you still might not be successful.
But once you come to terms with that and are willing to just let the outcome not dictate your personal happiness, you’ll find that your success will skyrocket.
As the old saying goes, it’s about the journey, not the destination.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Matt Juul Matt Juul is loving college life as he pursues a career in journalism and cinema. A freelance writer, his interests and expertise range from personal development and dating to fitness and the martial arts. Currently based out of Boston, Matt spends his free time training in MMA, as he hopes to get in the cage soon!