Why She Doesn’t Want to Sleep with You
Some guys are happy to be in a hot girl’s friend zone. They think that being her friend is a step towards having sex with her. They tell themselves that they just have to wait for the “right moment” to make a move.
But a guy who has this kind of mindset is setting himself up for failure.
In reality, having her think of you as a “friend” will kill your chances of getting her into bed. That’s right, by acting like her friend instead of making your move early, you can actually convince her NOT to want to sleep with you.
OK, now I’m going to tell you something that might seem a little harsh. But it is something that a lot of guys probably need to hear. In fact, I wish someone had told it to me when I was struggling to get out of girls’ friend zones.
If she doesn’t want you to bang her, you have no one to blame but yourself.
Let me explain further because a lot of guys get this wrong, and they don’t even know that they are messing it up. I made this mistake AGAIN and AGAIN until I finally figured out what was happening.
Guys try too hard to be likeable and friendly.
They think that is what girls want. So they work to show her this friendly image of themselves.
I was guilty of this a lot in college. I would build rapport with girls and then figure that all I had to do was to keep it going, keep being their friend, and eventually the “right time” would come and I could make my move (I could go in for a kiss or ask her back to my place).
BUT the “right time” would never come. I’d get impatient or desperate and end up making an awkward, embarrassing confession that I was attracted to her.
Of course, each girl saw me as a friend, she didn’t think of me in a sexual way AT ALL. So I would ALWAYS get shot down.
Looking back, my mistakes at that time are clear to me now. By being friendly and not making a move, I had failed to create any sort of sexual chemistry. I didn’t follow the first rule of seduction:
Girls ONLY want to bang guys who can create some sort of sexual chemistry with them.
The best time to make your move is RIGHT NOW
You have to create sexual chemistry RIGHT AWAY.
Whether you have been in a girl’s friend zone for months or you find yourself talking to a sexy girl for the first time, the right time to start creating sexual chemistry is NOW.
But how can you jump right into the sex talk without seeming creepy or overly aggressive or risking the rapport that you have already built up with a girl?
These are legit worries that can keep guys from ever escalating to sex with girls.
Start slow, but start NOW, and then never stop accelerating
I like to explain this strategy like this:
It’s like driving a manual transmission car. You don’t start at top speed and top gear. You shift up as you accelerate. You take it level by level, gear by gear, until you get to highway speed.
It’s the same with creating a sexual vibe with a girl. You don’t start with “let’s go back to my place and have sex.” You escalate gradually, with each new move a little more sexual than the last one.
I’ll admit, there are a lot of chances to screw this up.
Make a wrong move and she WILL think that you are being overly aggressive or even creepy. Or if your references to sex are too subtle, she won’t even notice and you will still end up in the friend zone.
This is exactly why I made this blueprint. Once you understand how to use it, it will literally seem as easy as shifting through the gears on a car.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.