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2 Tools To Stop Her From Losing Interest

losinginterest

We’ve all been there. You hit it off with a girl, maybe a coworker or even a fresh meet from a bar or party. You get along great, flirt heavily and then, over time, it just dies.

Sure, you might be really good at getting numbers, maybe even having one night stands, but you never seem to get that first date or establish a relationship. All your flames burn out.

Luckily, the fixes to this problem are quick and easy to master.

Before we get into it, though, here are two things you should NEVER do, because they are absolute deal breakers:

a) Confess your undying love for her. It sounds creepy and desperate. Save it for your wedding vows.
b) Become some Julien Blanc character, grabbing and harassing women physically. I don’t even care if it gets you laid by accident. Besides the fact that women will ultimately resent you for it, nothing feels as good as dignity. Be a man, keep it nonviolent.

 

Okay, now that we’re clear on the ground rules, let’s move on to the good stuff.

 

1. Act fast.

Ever hear the phrase, “strike while the iron is hot”?

Well it applies to just about every part of the relationship process, from getting numbers, to hook ups, to first dates, to getting into an actual relationship.

Sure, you need to heat the iron up a bit first, building rapport, creating inside jokes, flirting and so on. But if you wait too long to strike, that iron is going to cool down and you won’t be able to make anything happen with it.

Meaning, if you keep flirting, and flirting, and flirting, and never actually make your move of asking her out, she’s going to assume that you’re not interested or worse, confident enough to think you deserve her, and that will make her lose interest.

 

2. Make the relationship sexual.

Speaking of getting that iron hot, make sure your flirting and the nature of your relationship is sexually charged. You want to always be building tension between you and her in order to get her to see you as a sexual candidate.

Do not ever underestimate women as your sexual equal. They want a sexual relationship as much as you do, and (just like you would) if they don’t get it from you, they’re going to find someone else to get it from.

Of course you want to let a girl know that you’re sexually attracted to them when you meet, but don’t throw that book out the window once things progress past the bar.

Joke about getting married and having wild sex. When you start to playfully bicker, throw out something like,

“Oh my god, we are going to fight like crazy when we get married. At least the make up sex will be amazing.”

Kinesthetics or ‘kino’ (that’s physical contact, for the layman) is also your friend here.

Now, I get how difficult physical contact can be for some people. Personally, I’m an introvert and it’s just not in my nature to be touchy-feely. I’m just not a ‘hugger’, you know?

That being said, you’ll find that kino is an absolute game changer, and a little goes a long way.

Work in those casual shoulder and knee touches during conversation and don’t shy away from obvious cues for physical contact when and where you can.

As a test, try going in for a high five or handshake and seeing how long she’ll leave her hand in yours. Her wrapping her fingers around yours is a green light to strike that iron.

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About David Maitland David Maitland is a writer living in Vancouver, Canada.

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