Are You Destroying Your Own Game?
The biggest obstacle to getting girls is you.
If you’re exhibiting any of these bad behaviors or mindsets, it could be what’s killing your game.
You need to get the idea out of your head that women don’t find you attractive. It doesn’t matter if you don’t look like Arnold in his prime or dress in $2,000 suits every day.
The fact is, so much of “looking attractive” is about how you carry yourself. It changes the way you’re perceived.
For the life of me, I can’t figure out what women find physically attractive about me. I don’t have a very symmetrical face, I have a cross-bite, I don’t really work out, I don’t have abs and I certainly don’t wax or any of that nonsense.
But I try to carry myself like I’m Brad Pitt, and I can guarantee that every guy who regularly gets girls does the same. I know the nights when I feel like a million bucks, and those are always the ones that end well.
Why this works is because if you act confident in your looks, women think that you must have a reason to act that way. They think that you must be desirable by other women, which means that you’re valuable.
If you don’t think you’re physically attractive, than you’re not. Plain and simple.
The second that she’s not around, or doesn’t reply to a text or something goes wrong outside of your weird fantasy where she falls instantly in love with you and follows you around with puppy-dog eyes forever, you panic.
Either you send a too quick, too long follow up text, or you follow her around the room. It’s gross. And needy. And in a woman’s eyes, it’s no way for a desirable man to act.
The reason your instinct is to act like this is because humans still live in a “right here, right now” state of mind. We think whatever is happening now is the last thing that will ever happen. We don’t think the future really exists, not on a subconscious level anyway.
It’s why we procrastinate and it’s why we panic. To defeat this, you need to acknowledge that “now” is not forever.
There are other girls in the world and you never know when another one is going to cross your path. Hold that premise true and instantly watch your success with women turn around.
Oh, and you’ll probably live longer too. So, you know, that’s a bonus.
Girls want to have sex.
Drill that into your mind and keep it there.
Now I want you to think about how a girl would convey to you that she wants to have sex with you.
She probably wouldn’t instantly say all these super dirty lines lifted from pornos, she’d probably drop little hints. She’d create riffs and jokes with you about making out, sleeping together and getting married.
And that’s what you need to do to save yourself from the friend zone; spark attraction
Here at TSB, this trick has been labeled as ‘break rapport, establish attraction.’
Honestly, it’s probably the biggest factor in changing your game overnight. All of the sudden, the nature of the relationship you have with a girl is sexual.
So stop thinking like you’re still in middle school, and that bringing up sex with a girl will make her run in the other direction. Not talking about sex makes you look immature, and no girl wants to be with somebody who’s immature.
The same goes with physically escalating things. Stop not going in for the kiss at the end of the night. Fortune favors the bold.
There’s nothing more unattractive than a guy who doesn’t stand up for himself.
If you’re automatically agreeing with everything a woman says, or saying things on purpose just try and please her, it comes off as needy, spineless and frankly, like you don’t have a personality. You don’t even seem like a real person. You seem fake.
And women hate that.
You don’t have to find nothing to agree on, but just don’t change who you are or compromise yourself.
Sexual tension is so often based on friction (in this case, I’m talking about the metaphorical kind). So disagree about things, challenge her points and debate with her on things.
It creates tension, challenge and anticipation for a woman.
When talking with a girl, try mentioning how much you’ll probably fight once you’re married.
It’s actually a double whammy, because in one swoop, you’re establishing attraction and creating friction.
If girls see that you just like all girls, they won’t believe you when you show interest in them.
So start disqualifying girls, you don’t need to be mean, but just don’t be flirting with them.
Oh, and you can totally cold shoulder hot girls if you want to. Do not feel the need to flirt with a girl, just because you think she’s hot. If you’re not digging her, you don’t have to talk to her.
Have deal breakers. And stick to them.
Some girls might get kind of mad, because they don’t know how to handle “rejection”. But most of the time it’ll actually make you more desirable to them, and it’ll really make you desirable to any girl who sees you turn them down, before hitting on them.
You’re showing that you have high standards, and that your time is valuable.
The inverse is true for low standards, so don’t under estimate yourself and don’t feel the need to compromise.
Always be after your dream girl.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About David Maitland David Maitland is a writer living in Vancouver, Canada.