The Number 1 Mistake Guys Make With Attraction
You probably don’t need to be sold on the concept of “game” if you’re reading this.
Somewhere along the line, you decided that you were dissatisfied with your current level of success when it came to women.
Maybe you were dumped, or maybe you just felt like you were on a hamster wheel. Or maybe, you’re just one of those people who feels that any problem in life is solvable with logic, and is up for examination.
If you’re like me, maybe you’re just somebody who feels that a nagging problem always needs to be solved.
Either way, the ability to seduce women and become more attractive to them at some point alluded you, and now, maybe, hopefully, not so much.
But here’s the thing, there’s this evolutionary thing that happens with “game” at a certain point, and it can go very, very wrong for you if you let it.
When you first start trying out tactics that you’ve learned, you probably won’t be great at them, and your success will probably be varied at best. A lot of guys quit here because they expect to be good at something the first time they try it, and have apparently never heard that practice makes perfect.
Next, you become a sort of journeyman, where you’re getting the hang of everything and all the concepts start to click. Maybe you’re still sticking to tried and true methods, but you also don’t have to try to remember rehearsed lines either.
But here’s where guys mess up, and it’s the number one mistake they make with game;
Unfortunately, one of the terrible growing pains of game, is that you can get so hung up on getting girls, and proficient enough to do it all the time, that you sort of lose yourself and let it consume your personality.
The thing is that these tactics of attraction, in and of themselves, without your personality, passion and unique qualities intertwined with them, can be cold and empty.
Now, I know you’re asking, “well yeah, but isn’t the purpose of all this to get girls?”
Yes and no.
The purpose of all this is to take control of yourself and your life, and to give yourself a confidence to succeed.
Remember this was all about solving a problem.
By removing the problem and stress of not being successful with women, you give yourself the confidence to take on other challenges in your life.
Game is good for your ambition, and the irony? Ambition is good for game.
Ambition is arguably the most attractive quality women look for in guys.
The problem arises when guys get so into game that it actually backfires on them.
Because the second that you maybe have a girl slip away for whatever reason, and you’ve made getting them the end all be all of your life, you’re probably going to freak out and stress over that girl.
And then you’re right back where you started without game. Stressing over girls.
Worse, not only will this kind of fake persona- this wall you’re putting up, eventually start to affect your ability to attract girls in general, but it can limit your ability to have a real, meaningful relationship.
Yes, quality, confident women are attracted to the same kind of men. But, you also have to be a real person. You’ve go to be human.
And sometimes our minor flaws and unique personalities are the things that do just that.
So just don’t get too hung up on “winning”. Once you do that, it’s not fun anymore.
And this is a game. Games are supposed to be fun.
About David Maitland David Maitland is a writer living in Vancouver, Canada.