The 3 Levels of the Friend Zone – Which One Are You?

Chances are, if you’re in the Friend Zone right now with one girl, you’re probably in the Friend Zone with tons of girls. ?In fact, probably all of the girls in your life.

It really isn’t possible to be in the Friend Zone with just one girl.

The question is not how to get out of the Friend Zone with just the one girl, but to get out of the Friend Zone for life.

Think of it like a department in an office building in the basement that some unlucky people get to work in, and even though they all want out, they still come to work in that department every single day.

Once you’re out of that department, you simply just never go back down to the basement of that office building ever again.

The trick is to learn how deep you are into the Friend Zone in the first place.

How long have you been there, and more importantly why you’re in the Friend Zone.

The 3 Levels of the Friend Zone – Which One Are You?

There are precisely 3 levels of the Friend Zone.

They range from easy to get out of, all the way up to being hard to get out of. ?Hopefully, you’re in the easier levels of the Friend Zone, since the harder levels are, well…hard to get out of. ?Almost impossible.

Let’s explore the levels of the Friend Zone…

Friend Zone Level I

Name: The Brotherly Friend

Skill: Easy

Unfortunately, a lot of guys try to act like her brother or her dad to protect her from the world. ?Not only is this ridiculous, it’s downright rude. ?She can protect herself, and chances are she already has a brother and a dad to protect her when she needs help.

What she really wants?and needs in life is a sexual man to give her sexual attention, which makes this level super?easy to turn around, I assure you.

Just look at what this guy, David, sent a friend of mine on Tinder the other day…

That’s weird, isn’t it? ?I think so. ?So did she, which is why she didn’t respond, and why I’ve put this as a prime example of what NOT to do.

David shouldn’t be trying to be a girl’s older (or in his case, younger) brother, he should be focusing on fulfilling her actual needs as a woman.

Friend Zone Level II

Name: The Gay Bestie (lol!)

Skill: Intermediate

This is next easiest Friend Zone Level to escape from, depending on whether or not you know that you’re acting gay around women.

For example, I would act gay around women on purpose, because it made them laugh. ?After not getting any girls, I found out something that trumps a sense of humour and laughter…

Gay is not what straight women are looking for.

Thankfully, this was a super easy fix: I stopped acting gay.

On the other hand, you may ?be guilty of acting gay around women without even knowing it! ?I’ve seen this a lot, actually.

A friend of mine had no idea it was going on until he saw a tape playback of him talking to a girl and guess what? ?He was lisping! ?He doesn’t have a lisp when he’s talking with other guys, but when in front of a woman, all of a sudden the lisp came out.

Friend Zone Level III (Hard) – The Family Friend

Name: The Family Friend

Skill: Hard

Unfortunately… ?You’re permanently stuck here at this level.

Unless you exit her life for a long period of time, (and I mean years, in order to reappear like a bolt of lightning that makes her second guess herself) you’re not getting out of this Friend Zone Level alive.

This Friend Zone Level is a matter of the fact that you two grew up together.

Sorry, dude.

The girl next door is NOT fantasizing about you, she’s too busy thinking of all the other guys she doesn’t see as being family. ?You’re like a brother to her. ?Chances are, if you’re an awesome guy, her parents are probably telling her to stop dating douchebags and to date you, which actually makes it worse. ?Girls do the opposite of what they’re told.

And besides. ?You’re just family. ?You’re like her brother. ?And as long as she sees you as a brother, she’s just not going to have feelings for you.

Which level of the Friend Zone are you in?

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About Kevin Alexander Kevin Alexander is a no-nonsense dating expert and coach based in Edmonton, Canada. He works mostly with shy, introverted nice guys who are tired of finishing last with women, and are ready to start finishing first with women. He is the founder of Nice Guy Dating, which features products, services, and a blog entailing dating details from his own life and from the lives of others. Find him at, email at, and follow him at @niceguydating.

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