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How To Enjoy The Office Christmas Party

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Tis the season to be jolly, which means it is also time for the office Christmas party. The annual stream of articles stating the obvious have already begun to flow. Don’t get sozzled into oblivion, don’t feel up your boss’s wife (or teenage daughter), don’t get naked, don’t dance on your desk or anyone else’s, don’t piss in the bathroom trash can. Every sane person knows not to engage in such mad and obscene acts.

The office Christmas party is not the place to be reckless. Nor must you go to the other extreme and behave as though you are going to a funeral or to church with your mother. You should be able to blow off steam and enjoy the company of your colleagues.

If you are like most people, you will count at least a few of your work colleagues as friends. This is especially the case in high-end professions such as law, consulting, medicine, politics, and finance. These professions are demanding and require you to spend a great many hours together working through problems and completing deliverables for clients. It is right that you indulge in holiday revels with people you’ve grown close to.

Discretion and awareness are all that you need to recreate yourself thoroughly without ruining your career.

You should drink while you’re at the party. And there is nothing wrong with arriving with a buzz on. Just be smart about it. Know your limits. Different people behave differently when they are drunk. Some become unusually chatty. Others become aggressive and violent. Some folks become soppy, sentimental, and even teary-eyed. If you are a charming drunk, if you are a man who likes to quote poetry or reminisce about good times long past, you may actually provide a bit of uplift, a bit of light and entertainment at the party.

The point here is that if you know you have a tendency to act wildly and foolishly when drunk, then you should not get drunk. Either leave the party early on your own or arrange ahead of time to meet a few of your colleagues at the party, stay long enough to show your faces, and go elsewhere to finish off the night.

Hooking up with colleague at the party is something I am very much for. If the colleague you’ve been flirting with has been receptive to your advances, the night of the office Christmas party may be the perfect time to make a decisive move. Again, be discrete. You want to avoid making out in front of the boss. And although it is every man’s fantasy to fuck a hot colleague in the office, don’t do it—even if she’s up for it.

The reason why you should not be tempted into the latter is the presence of Smartphones and other recording devices. Everyone will have one with them, and they will all be looking to take photos and video they can post on social media. If you are caught on video in a compromising situation or acting like a complete ass, it will follow you for some time. Even if you leave your present company, the video is out there and may damage your prospects for getting a fresh start anywhere.

Don’t take the chance. Take your romance elsewhere.

Finally, make it a point to network. The people you work for are looking to relax as well. The office Christmas party is a time when you can show your boss a livelier side of your personality. It isn’t necessary for you to stick to him or her all night, but a few minutes of conversation before things get going and booze starts flowing may smooth, however slightly, the path of your career advancement.

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About Christopher Reid Chris was born in Washington, D.C. and lives in Britain. He works as a blogger, essayist, and novelist. His first book, Tea with Maureen, has just been published.

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