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Tinder Messaging Tips to up Your Game

Tinder Messaging Tips

With Tinder, most of us worry about the big stuff. You know, getting girls to swipe right on us and that hallelujah moment we get when the little screen pops up as, ‘It’s a match!’ But what really catches most of us out is what to do once we get the match.

With 50 million overall users and 10 million daily users, there’s plenty of matches to go around on Tinder for everybody, but that also means, there is a real challenge. When women are getting so many matches, how do you stand out from the crowd?

This article?will take you through some of the best Tinder messaging tips available so that you can not only stand out from the rest, but actually land that date.

First, Why Do so Many Guys Fail at Conversation?

Before you start dominating the Tinder game, you first need to realise why so many guys fail at conversation. When you look at the type of conversations?girls receive from guys, it becomes pretty clear why so many people fail. Here are some of the first messages that a girl receives from her Tinder matches:

  • 50% – No message at all
  • 36% – Hey/Hi/What’s up?
  • 14% – A unique message

Half of the guys on Tinder aren’t even starting a conversation; that’s great as it means more opportunity for you. It also means that seven out of ten conversations with most girls are boring or generic, another bonus.

Most guys are failing at Tinder because they’re starting their conversations off in a boring way, saying the same thing as every other guy out there isn’t exciting, and it isn’t going to grab a girl’s attention.

Top Tips for a Successful Conversation

To help you out then, I’ve compiled together a list of awesome Tinder messaging tips to help you hit the ground running with your conversation.

Let’s get started!

Actually Start the Conversation

Yep, you might have guessed this one but with 50% of guys not even reaching out to girls at all, the number one tip is to actually get started. Why is this so hard for so many guys?

Lots of guys when swiping on Tinder are just swiping right to everyone and everything. If you aren’t going to be interested in a girl if she matches, save yourself the hassle and take your time going through your Tinder search. Only swipe right on people who you will actually want to start a conversation with.

Not only will you be more motivated and less overwhelmed to speak to your matches, you’ll probably be able to start a conversation easier too.

Keep Your Messages Short and Sweet

When you speak to a girl on Tinder, it’s a conversation. There are plenty of guys who mistake it for a chance to shout to a girl about how awesome they are.

Getting to know somebody isn’t a one-way street, and trust me when I say it’s boring to be on the end of a monologue.?

Messages that are below 20 words are quick and easy to respond to, which helps to keep the conversation flowing. It’s always good to ask questions as it shows your match that you are interested in her.

By asking questions you also begin to learn more about your match, and you may find you have commonalities. These commonalities can help you to grow a strong bond with each other and get more connected, all starting with a question.

Review Your Matches Profile Before Starting the Conversation

Make sure before you jump in, to actually check out the person you are about to start a conversation with. Do they have a pet? Are they into a hobby that you are too? Does their bio give away some important information that could make a strong bond between you?

Analysing a profile for just 20 seconds can help you to create a really personal opening message that is more likely to dignify a response. When you are looking at her profile try and find something that most guys wouldn’t count on.

Also, don’t forget, compliments are a great way to an excellent opener.

Evoke Some Emotion and Kick-Start Your Conversation

If you can evoke emotion in the first message you send, you’ll be more likely to catch your matches attention and get a response. Don’t mistake evoking emotion for being soft, with great emotional control comes incredible banter-filled Tinder conversations.

By evoking emotion you can make her feel excited just by complimenting her on a unique quality you noticed about her, try to make it something that no-one else would usually compliment her on. Going against the grain and straying away from ‘you’re beautiful’ or ‘great ass’ makes a big difference.

Emotions can also make her feel happy, by using something like a humorous opening line. Joking openers like ‘does this mean we’re official?’ can be a great way to inject a little comedy while also setting up your match for the thought of you being together in the future.

You can use the research you put into looking at her profile to make a powerful opening message, that ties into something she is passionate about. Emotion builds connections.

Use Your Tinder Matches Name in the Conversation

This is one of the oldest rules of salesmanship but it also applies to dating. When you use a persons name, you begin to build a connection with them.

Scientists have actually conducted research which tells us when we mention a girl’s name, her brain will light up! It’s a great way to structure your message around her and to get her to notice.

Pay Attention to the Details Your Match Reveals

We’re always told it’s important to pay attention to the conversation. To listen instead of just waiting for our turn to speak. The same is true for Tinder and dating in general.

When you’re speaking to your match she will reveal details about herself which will go unnoticed and can be forgotten. Remembering these points, and then working them back into the conversation can be a powerful tool in showing her that you are not only paying attention but are interested in what she has to say.

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About Jamie Atkinson Jamie Atkinson is a freelance writer and sales coach who has over 10 years of experience coaching, selling and training in the field. He was born in the UK but now travels all over the world, teaching other aspiring entrepreneurs how to achieve their own success by sharing the benefits of having a lifestyle business. You can find out more from Jamie over at

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