10 Tips for Giving Your Partner the Space She Needs
Moments like these don’t come along very often. But when they do, they have the capacity to make your blood run cold.
If you haven’t ever experienced it, I wouldn’t wish it on you. But chances are if you’re here reading this article, you have.
There’s probably three sentences that can give you that sick to the stomach, moment:
The first two can be huge bombshells and can leave you where you’re standing. But what about the harder to interpret third option? What do you do when your partner asks for space?
Firstly, it’s usually not as dramatic as it sounds. But in those moments, it’s so easy to jump to conclusions. Is she mad? Does she want to leave me? Is this the beginning of the end?
After your initial shock dies down, it becomes easier to see that giving each other space is actually a good thing. It can help your relationship grow as too much attention can leave your partner feeling smothered.
Once you realize that all your partner needs is a little breathing room, it becomes easier to see a way forward. To help you figure out how you can give her some much-needed space we’ve got just the answer.
Here are some awesome tips to help you give your partner the space that she — and you — need and deserve.
When your partner is talking to you about what they need, that’s them communicating with you. They are taking the time to talk to you and tell you what they and your relationship need.
This is a good sign, as communication in couples is a really healthy way to grow together.
Just remember that they aren’t asking for this alone time so that they can hurt you, it’s because they feel like they need that time alone. You should always try to be respectful of their wishes and be thankful they asked you at all.
Reacting well to this discussion and not taking it personally is the best reaction.
You might be surprised to find out that actually, time apart is a positive thing. We aren’t saying you should be jumping for joy from ceiling to floor about spending time away from your partner.
But having time away from each other is a sign of a healthy relationship. Having separate interests and hobbies is a healthy way to make sure you and your partner aren’t co-dependent on each other.
It also means that when you come back from your separate activities, you have stories to tell and feel refreshed and ready to share.
Sometimes, when your partner asks for some space, she needs real space. What she needs will depend on her and the discussion you have.
Make sure you speak about an agreed-upon timeframe. For one, it might be less serious than you think. She could want you to give her more space around the home to do her own thing.
Sometimes though, your partner will want time to herself without communication. If she asks you not to text her for a week, don’t text her.
Respecting her wishes and giving her the space she needs and has asked for is a sign of respect and can help her gather her thoughts.
One of the most positive aspects of happiness is to have a really solid personal identity. What does that mean?
It means doing your own thing. When you are in a relationship, you can find that the lines get blurred between you and her, into we.
While it’s not a bad thing to have shared experiences, it’s not a great idea to have no sense of personal identity. In these moments it’s a good idea to take some time for yourself.
Take a class, why not read something new and try and get back in touch with yourself and what you want.
If giving your partner a lot of space is messing with your head, don’t be scared to be honest with yourself. You should always give yourself room to feel your emotions.
That can be hard as guys, but holding in a feeling of fear or uncertainty can weigh heavily on the mind.
Remember, you don’t need to act on your emotions. You need to feel them, accept them and respect your feelings without any judgment on yourself.
Space is a two-way street. When your partner asks for time alone out of respect for her, she should also respect you by trying to understand how you feel and having a conversation about it.
Honesty is always the best policy, and if you need to tell your significant other how you feel, you should do so. It’s important she knows how you feel so you can work it out together.
This rule is incredibly important. If your other half needs time away from you or space, you should make sure to respect her wishes.
If they don’t want any contact at all for two weeks, you should do just that. By ignoring these wishes or ‘rules’ that are set up, you’re not giving them what they have requested.
We all know in these moments, inside you can feel completely torn, beaten or defeated. But being supportive of your partner and even actively encouraging her is a sign that you are putting your wants aside for her needs.
This act of selflessness is a great sign of commitment to your partner. It’s even a great idea to encourage and suggest these kinds of activities before things reach boiling point.
Time apart helps you to grow your identity, and this is an important aspect of growing together as a couple.
Having time to yourself is going to help distract you from the problems at home, and that personal time is a good thing.
You’ll find some moments all you will be able to think about is the loneliness. In those moments make sure to surround yourself with good friends, take some time for yourself.
Have a hot shower, go to the movies or treat yourself to a well-cooked healthy meal. Remember in these moments to treat yourself kindly.
One of the final things to consider is that when your partner puts you at arm’s length, the distance can help to bring you closer together. When this happens, make sure not to bring anger or resentment into the conversation when you are reunited.
Give your other half the space to miss you, and then make sure when you are back together it’s a positive and high-quality reunion.
In these moments of space and separation, it’s easy to grab your phone and feel the need to call your partner. But this can just increase resentment and smother her more.
Instead, trust in the process of giving her space. Focus on yourself, and you’ll give yourself the best chance of making it through this situation.
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About Jamie Atkinson Jamie Atkinson is a freelance writer and sales coach who has over 10 years of experience coaching, selling and training in the field. He was born in the UK but now travels all over the world, teaching other aspiring entrepreneurs how to achieve their own success by sharing the benefits of having a lifestyle business. You can find out more from Jamie over at www.letsgetjobless.com