Free Course: Eliminate Your Inner “Nice Guy” and Pass Girl’s Secret Tests

How to Date Hotter Girls

Why She’s Never Out of Your League

Women are mysterious creatures…

…They are beautiful and elegant yet can be more vicious than a hungry lioness…

…There is a whole industry for advice on attracting and keeping women because they are so mysterious and complicated…

…They are difficult to understand and even the guys with the best game in the world struggle sometimes.

Really hot girls are even worse!

Some of these women out here are so beautiful they must have been sent from the heavens or another planet or something…

…Sometimes its hard to believe they’re even human like the rest of us…

Part of the problem is that because women are so mysterious, difficult to figure out and beautiful we make the mistake of forgetting that they are just people like the rest of us.

This puts us in a position where we are unconsciously placing some women on a pedestal

WHICH IS A HUGE MISTAKE!

…Picture this for me…

A beautiful woman literally standing up on a pedestal looking all sexy and shit…

…Now imagine that you say hi to her and tell her your name…

…What did she do when you spoke to her?…

She looked down at you.

Since she is standing on a pedestal, she had to LOOK DOWN ON YOU just to talk to you…

Do you see what happened there?

That isn’t just a metaphor, that is what actually happens when we put women on a pedestal…

We have put her in a position of power and now she looks down on us.

This is a huge mistake because now we have pretty much told her that she is so much better than us so WHY THE FUCK WOULD SHE WANT US?

…Maybe if she’s feeling charitable, she’ll give us the time of day because we have built her up and completely devalued ourselves…

But the good news is…

VAN’S GOT YOUR BACK!

 

 

Why We Can’t Help Putting Women on a Pedestal

The fact is that most of our perspective of women is formed from either our personal experiences or by what we are taught in the media and social media.

…LET’S BREAK IT ON DOWN…

For a lot of us our personal experiences with women involve us being nervous around them…

…Even our interactions with them involve trying to attract them and maybe even rejection…

We are in a position where they have some that we want whether that’s time, attention, or the ELUSIVE PUSSY!

Let’s hop on social media and see what we can see.

…Looks like a bunch of Instagram models and shit all made up and perfect looking with the right filter to make them look like they aren’t even in real life…

Everywhere you look you see women being displayed as these amazing sexual objects…

So, when we add it all together, our perspective of women is just that they are beautiful and they have 100% of the pussy in this world and we are just the poor fool trying to convince them that we are worth their time…

If we don’t check ourselves then we will start to believe this shit!

…AND EVEN WORSE is if men are constantly putting women on a pedestal then they start believing it too and get an over inflated ego which makes it much harder for us to have a chance with them…

 

WHEN I CRACKED THE CODE.

Everything changed for me when I moved into a house with a bunch of women back in college.

HERE’S WHAT I FIGURED OUT!

Women are people just like you and I…

They have insecurities, and they talk about guys they have a crush on…

…THEY EVEN STRESS ABOUT HOW TO GET THE GUY…

Probably worse than we do a lot of times…

Once I realized this, it removed the illusion I had of women.

They were no longer these magical mystical creatures so I not only did it allow me to stop putting them on a pedestal but it MADE IT SO I COULDN’T EVEN IF I WANTED TO…

…You can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube…

What this allowed me to do is have much more confidence when approaching women and interacting with them…

…Which resulted in me having much more success because I was seeing eye to eye with them instead of allowing them to look down on me…

This is the key to having an unshakeable frame because by just having this understanding, women can tell that you are not looking up at them and it completely disarms them.

 

HERE’S WHAT YOU’VE GOTTA DO!

Even if we haven’t had this realization and we are still unconsciously putting women on a pedestal, there are a few things that we can do when we talk to women that will show them, we aren’t looking up at them.

Practice talking to women like they are guys…ESPECIALLY THE HOT ONES.

Let me explain what I mean by that…

…calling her dude, bud, buddy, or other words like that when addressing her throw her off…

These words do not indicate at all that you are attracted to her and they certainly aren’t endearing but they also are not insulting.

It’s a sly way of telling her, “Ya, you think you’re hot but I could give a shit less.  That shit might work on other guys but not me”.

You can ask them questions that most guys wouldn’t even know to ask because they haven’t seen the secret home life of women…

Here are a few:

“Are you one of those girls that sticks your loose hairs to the wall in the shower or do you just let it clog the drain?”

“Which one is cleaner, your room or your car?”

“How any times a week do you eat dinner in bed?”

“Tell me about your most embarrassing moment.  I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“If you were gonna cook for your crush for your first date, what would you make?”

…If she tries to avoid the question by saying he needs to cook for her, tell her that’s not what you asked her and be persistent.  She’s just trying to avoid being vulnerable because she probably can’t cook but that’s ok.

What these questions do is they bring down the façade that she is perfect…

…It shows her that you know she is human…

…And most importantly is it shows her that YOU DON’T MIND…

This is the most important part because these questions take her to a place of mild vulnerability and by showing her that you accept her, she is going to have more trust with you and be more comfortable.

Pro Tips!

  • Women have just as many insecurities about dating as we do. It’s super important that if you ask her one of these questions, you give some sort of response to indicate to her that you’re alright with her being honest.  For example, with the hair in the shower question, you can say, “I was just wondering because I imagine the hair has to go somewhere and I wouldn’t know what to do with all that.”

 

  • A big reason why men get FRIENDZONED is because they are putting the girl on a pedestal. We want to break that habit as quickly as possible and set a different standard of the bat.  A good date idea is Buffalo Wild Wings or a place like that.  Instead of fancy dinner date, you take a more relaxing setting and show her that you aren’t going out of your way to impress her.  Plus wings are messy and she is can’t be acting all fancy and eat wings with a fork and knife.  IF SHE DOES, tell her she doesn’t have to be fake and you know she wanna double fist those wings like a fat kid…and that’s ok because you do too.

 

Keep cookin fellas,

Van

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About Van Bender Van Bender is a writer and coach specializing in becoming the alpha, the art of attraction and hacking the friendzone. Check out my website and subscribe for exclusive content Dayonedating.com

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