Picking Up Women
“How can I make this conversation more fun?”
A lot of guys write me asking why when they’re out picking up women, women always seem to become disinterested in them after five or ten minutes of talking.
The answer is simple.
She got bored.
You couldn’t keep her attention.
We live in an A.D.D. world where a woman has a million things to distract her from you.
She’s got a phone full of text messages, emails, and Facebook status updates she could be reading. She has six other guys lined up behind you waiting to talk to her.
The fact is, if you can’t capture her attention… you’re done.
And she won’t give you much time.
I learned this lesson the hard way.
After reading a bunch of books on “picking up women” I was convinced that it was my job to convince a woman how ‘high status’ I was. Or how coolly disinterested I was.
It didn’t work.
I never got rudely rejected. I never got put in the friend zone. I really never got much of anything.
Women were just…well, indifferent to me.
It became a vicious cycle.
The more indifferent the women became, the more I thought I had to act cooler, cockier, or more of an asshole.
Until one day I figured it out.
I was working as a waiter in Jose Tejas restaurant. And despite my great effort to appear “cool” and “alpha” the majority of my female co-workers didn’t even know I was alive.
On the other hand, there was this guy Marty who had the women eating out of the palm of his hand.
I was mystified because Marty was the “opposite of cool.”
He never told elaborate stories of him doing cool shit. He wasn’t very cocky. And instead of ignoring the girls and acting uninterested, Marty was constantly calling them over to chat with him. And often he would talk about lame, childish stuff.
I may have been bad with women. But I was not an idiot. I knew that whatever Marty was doing was working. And I wanted in.
Over the next couple months I became somewhat of Marty’s “sidekick.”
…And I loved every minute of it.
The guy was just pure ‘freaking’ fun to be around.
In fact, I would even go so far as to say ADDICTING.
I first realized how addicting he was to be around when he went on vacation for a couple weeks.
The entire atmosphere of the place just seemed gloomier. A certain ‘spark’ was gone.
And I instantly realized why all the women in the place chose Marty over me.
Marty was more fun.
Pure and simple. FUN. A lot more fun.
Hell, I would have chose Marty over me too. It was a no brainer.
Now I just had to figure out what made him so much damn fun to be around.
And that’s when I discovered the “Partner in Crime” technique.
What is it?
Marty had an insane ability to make you feel it was you and him against the world.
Whether you were conspiring a “secret” prank on another employee, had an inside joke about a customer, or were getting yelled at by the boss for goofing off too much… it was you and him.
He made you his partner in crime.
And it worked like gangbusters.
But here is the thing…
You can use this same technique on women you are meeting for the first time.
You just need to get them playing on the same team as you. Maybe you’re both laughing at some meathead in a mullet. Maybe there is a drunk guy hitting on her and when she glances at you- you give her the “help me” eyes. Or maybe when the bartender isn’t looking you pour a “free” shot for the both of you.
The idea is to create a “you and me” vibe with her.
This gets VERY FUN very fast.
Here is one of my FAVORITE TRICKS…
Once you’ve exchanged numbers with a girl you can use “texting” to add to the fun.
The other day I was talking to a girl in a bar. There was this really OLD CREEPY guy staring at her the entire conversation.
So when the guy wasn’t looking I snapped a quick picture of him with my camera phone. And sent her the picture with the caption “I think Old Man Creepers likes you”
When she got the text she burst into laughter.
It was fun.
And like Marty figured out nearly 10 years ago.
All women want is to have fun.
Next time you’re out, try looking for different ways you can make a girl your “partner in crime”. Once you’ve tested it out- email me your results…
P.S. To learn how to structure you entire conversation so that its fun, playful, and sexy check out my Conversation Escalation program.