How to Have Sex on a First Date
HavingÂ Sex on a First dateÂ
Having gone out with literally thousands of women and
gone to bed with hundreds over the past two and a half
decades, I’ve learned that there’s nothing you can do
to GUARANTEE having sex with any particular woman.
However, by doing a few simple things, you can
dramatically INCREASE THE ODDS of going all the way on
the very first night of your relationship.
1. Meet her in a non-traditional venue.
By that I mean, don’t take her to a fancy dinner or do
anything else that she associates with a â€˜date.â€™ If
you do, that puts her into the same â€˜make him waitâ€™
mindset that she adopted with the last 100 guys who
bought her a nice dinner.
Instead meet her somewhere informal, like a coffee
shop or some cheap diner for lunch. Don’t make a big
deal out of who pays for what, because again, the last
100 guys she dated paid for her meal because, as was
blatantly obvious to her, they were hoping to get
As an alpha male, you shouldn’t do anything because
you’re â€˜hoping to get laid.â€™ That reeks of desperation
and kills attraction that a woman feels.
A more attractive guy is one who gets laid all the
time, so sex is no big deal to him. If a woman wants
his attention, she has to earn it. In other words, he
is a challenge for her, not a sure thing.
2. Have the proper mindset throughout the date.
You want to be relaxed and feeling sexual. (To get
yourself into a sexual state, try watching porn just
before the date, but don’t masturbate.) And it’s
important to feel relaxed. No nervousness.
For a woman to become sexual, she needs to feel
relaxed and horny. It is important that you feel that
exact way yourself, because studies have shown that
when two people are in rapport, they eventually match
emotional states with each other.
So when you’re chilling with the girl, you should feel
deeply relaxed and horny, and then engage her in
conversation about neutral subjects until you see
signs that she too is getting relaxed and horny.
3. Get her alone with you.
Let’s say you and the girl hit it off fantastically in
the coffee shop, so you then take her to a bar to get
a quick drink. Things are really going well there. The
conversational vibe is excellent. You see signs of her
increasing sexual arousal and openness to intimacy.
Some signs of a woman’s deepening sexual attraction to
you include: – Sitting with her inner thigh exposed.
– Fidgeting with her clothes. She might even unfasten
a button or two of her blouse.
– She engages in â€˜triangle gazing.â€™ She’ll look at one
of your eyes, then another, and then at your mouth.
– You notice her stealing glimpses at your chest and
even your crotch.
The problem is you can’t just say, â€˜Let’s go to my
place and have sex.â€™ With women you’re on a first date
with, whenever you verbalize anything sexual, it kills
the mood for her and results in you sleeping alone
Instead, mention an innocent excuse for the two of you
to go to your place. (Examples could be, â€˜You should
come hear my ‘Best of the 80s’ CDâ€™ or â€˜That’s awesome
that you’re so good with art… I have a painting in
my living room that I’d love to get your opinion onâ€™)
Since the two of you have an â€˜innocentâ€™ reason to be
alone together, it avoids triggering the alarm bells
in her mind that scream, â€˜Uh oh! I don’t want to be a
Once the two of you are then alone, isolated at your
place, you can set the scene for the seduction.
It can take several hours for the woman to feel
comfortable enough with you at your house, so you need
to be patient.
Sit on your couch and watch a movie. Slowly escalate.
Hold hands, stroke her hair, and so on from there.
Sexually, women are like irons. They heat up slowly.
Keep that in mind and don’t rush things, and you’ll
have your maximum shot at having sex on a first date.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.