The Psychology of Seduction
The competent pickup artist must understand psychology. The more he knows about it the better. He must learn that certain effects lead to certain reactions, and use that knowledge to increase results and avoid mistakes.
Human nature is perpetual. In most respects it is the same today as in the time of Ceasar. So the principles of psychology are fixed and enduring. You will never need to unlearn what you learn about them.
While the specific techniques, pickup lines, routines, openers, and gimmicks taught by the top dating coaches might change in time, the psychology behind them will not. I learned this when I studied advertising and sales. You can learn as much about advertising and sales from a book written fifty years ago as you can from a book written two years ago. In some cases you can learn more.
This is because the principles that govern why human beings make decisions haven’t changed. Nor will they likely change in our lifetime.
In many respects seduction is just like sales. Think about it. Even the most PUA specific terms like false time restraint, DHV, indicator of interest… they all relate just as easily to sales. Robert Cialdini wrote a classic book, mentioned in The Game, called Influence. This book lays out the six weapons of influence. I suggest you read each of these over, and ask yourself “How can I apply this to dating?”
Perceived scarcity will generate demand. For example, saying offers are available for a “limited time only” encourages sales. Have you noticed how girls are much more likely to put out on vacation when they know that you may be disappearing in a few days?
People tend to return a favor. This is why so many companies offer you a free sample. They know you are more likely to feel obliged to buy from them next time you want the product.
3. Social Proof
People will do things that they see other people are doing. This one has been well documented in the PUA community. Most of the time people look at the crowd to see how they should act or react. This is why you often see “New York Times Best Seller” on the cover of the book. It is proven that if we think many other people have already bought something, we will be much more likely to make the same purchase.
4. Commitment and Consistency
If people commit, orally or in writing, to an idea or goal, they are more likely to honor that commitment. Even if the original incentive or motivation is removed after they have already agreed, they will continue to honor the agreement. For example, in car sales, suddenly raising the price at the last moment works because the buyer has already decided to buy.
People will tend to obey authority figures, even if they are asked to perform objectionable acts.
People are easily persuaded by other people that they like. It is much harder to turn down a salesman who you like than someone who is cold or distant with you.
These 6 weapons of influence can easily be transmuted to pickup, dating, or seduction. AFC Adam Lyons once told me that he learned everything he knows about pickup from reading studying psychology books. If you understand the power of these 6 weapons you implement each of them into your entire way of being.
I highly recommend pondering this over.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.