Be a Champ: Living with Intention
You see a cutie at a bookstore and devise a plan to get wit her. Sounds good brother! Problem is, shit crops up, and it tries to derail you every fucking step of the way…
Step One: Approach Her
You step to her, but at that very moment, her cell goes off. You abort and reach for a book to save face.
Step Two: Game Her
She hangs up and you do finally open her and spit some game. She’s digging you, but the bookstore is closing. You’re forced to leave before the moment feels right to get her number.
Step Three: Get Her Digits
The two of you keep talking outside. Things are going swell, so you give her your phone and tell her to punch in her number. “Awww … I have a boyfriend,” she apologizes. But you keep chatting her up and finally she admits they’ve broken up a few times and the relationship has been mostly strained. Nice! You invite her to hang out in a few days.
Step Four: Take Her Out
The time comes to meet up, but she gives you a last-minute excuse about needing to hang out with her dad. You reschedule, she flakes, you reschedule, she flakes. Finally, with enough persistence and game, the two of you meet up.
Step Five: Close The Deal
It’s going smoothly. You get her back to your pad and make out, but she resists getting totally undressed. After two hours of foreplay she surrenders and you seduce her. Lay report to follow.
We can all relate to having goals, even these very goals. You see a lovely girl and then a flood of ideas similar to the above pops into your head, planted there by well-meaning fellas like myself…
THE GAME PLAN: approach, gain attraction, take her number, run text game, work logistics, get her out, escalate, pull, close.
By themselves however, these goals may or may not be enough. When they aren’t – as is so often the case – you need something else you can fall back on, something broader and more powerful. That something is your intention.
Goal vs. Intention
So what’s the diff? The intention was that thought which clicked on in your head when you saw the hottie: “I am going to seduce her.” It’s your internal call to action. That plan may not be possible. It may in fact have absolutely no basis in reality. It may be so outside your comfort zone and beyond your skill set that the chances of it coming to fruition are as unlikely as a good Jennifer Aniston film.
But intentions don’t care about all that. “I am going to seduce her. Let’s make it happen. Go.”
You set your intention, and then you go about finding ways to bring it into reality. Often you will need to create a series of goals, such as the above. Many times, though, the universe will sort itself out automagically, seemingly with little effort on your part, where everything falls into place.
Goals are at the service of your intention. When certain goals fail (her phone goes off as you approach, she’s got a boyfriend, she keeps flaking), you can always abandon that particular goal and fall back onto your intention for further guidance. Your unwavering intention will then compel you to seek out, stumble upon or invent new goals to see you through.
About Dr. Evan Marlowe Evan Marlow is the dean and founder of Man School. You can visit at Manschool.cc