The 7 Deadly Sins of Daygame
1. The Interview
We begin with the most common but deadliest sin of all – asking her too many questions. It’s easily done: you go in there and open with a compliment, she smiles and says thanks, and then you stand there awkwardly wondering what to say before inevitably settling on: “so… what are you doing today?”
If you start the interaction this way you are setting yourself up for an uncomfortable Q&A session. She’s unlikely to give you much to work with this early on beyond “I’m doing some shopping”, which doesn’t present many opportunities to continue the conversation. So rather than interrogating her, make a statement based on her appearance or the situation you find yourselves in. Your statements don’t even have to be accurate. Maybe her clothes suggest she’s a hippy when in reality she works as an investment banker. It doesn’t matter. By making statements you are encouraging her to reveal herself to you – maybe literally if you play your cards right – without it feeling like an interrogation.
2. Ejecting Too Early
The first minute of a daygame interaction can feel amazing for both of you. You are riding on the high of approaching despite feelings of anxiety, and she’s caught up in this Disneyesque fantasy of being swept off her feet by a stranger. Unfortunately, this doesn’t last forever so you’ll have to actually hold a conversation before she gives you her number or agrees to meet up with you.
All conversations have peaks and troughs, and often when we’re feeling anxious we become overly-sensitive to signs that she’s not interested. Perhaps she looks at her watch or doesn’t laugh at our ‘hilarious’ jokes. ‘Signs’ such as these that aren’t overly positive can make us want to eject, either out of politeness or to avoid digging ourselves a conversational hole.
The thing is, THIS is where you have to persevere the most. 99% of guys would cave in at the first sign of perceived rejection. But by plowing through you demonstrate that your confidence is unbreakable.
3. Talking About Yourself
A lot of traditional pick-up material centers around the idea that we should be out there selling ourselves to women. DHV stories and peacocking encourage us to perform in one way or another in order to impress and seduce girls. However, much of this theory was developed with nightgame in mind. During the day, there is no need to tell her that you wrestled a bear while descending from a burning plane at 10,000 feet. The fact that you had the balls to approach during the day is a massive DHV in itself.
Instead you should be focusing the conversation on HER. Think of it from her perspective: she’s walking along doing her shopping at 2pm on a Monday afternoon when a guy sprints across the street to tell her how beautiful she is. She instantly sees him as someone who knows what he wants, so the next logical step for him is to learn more about her to see if she fits his strict criteria. Also, very few women will be interested in the life story of a guy they’ve just met, even one as amazing as you.
4. Playing It Safe
As has been stated thousands of times before, the number one thing a woman looks for in a man is confidence. And if you don’t appear confident in the things you say as well as the things you do, she will quickly lose interest.
If she likes watching rom-coms and you hate them, say so. Obviously you don’t want to offend her, but as we all know it’s easy to fall into a pattern of blindly agreeing with a woman you like because you think it’ll make her like you more. The irony is that it’ll do the opposite.
As guys we love to plan and rationalize things. However, in a day game scenario, this can be more of a hindrance than a help. The longer you spend thinking about approaching, the harder it becomes. And even once the approach is done, if you have a script in your head, the chances are you’ll get flustered if you try to remember it all.
As with most things, the best way to get good at this is to practice. Lots. The more familiar approaching during the day becomes, the easier it will be. Once you’ve done x amount of approaches, you’ll be comfortable and relaxed enough to think on your feet instead of relying on canned material that was probably written for nightgame.
6. Dressing Badly
At the beginning of their daygame adventure, many guys spend hours at a time on the street with the soul aim of approaching women. Most will dress well for the occasion, rightfully noting that women pay considerable attention to a man’s dress sense. However, this is soon forgotten when they are ready to integrate daygame into their daily lives. But what would happen if you were to nip into town in a paint-spattered 90s tracksuit, only to spot the woman of your dreams sauntering across the street?
I’m not saying that you should dress in a dapper suit when you go out grocery shopping, rather that fashion and good dress-sense should become part of who you are. You don’t even have to spend a lot of money to look good. Take a note of what styles are in fashion and then go out and find some inexpensive clothes and accessories that‘ll make you look good.
It’s fair to assume that a good 70%+ of people who learn about game never actually do anything with their acquired knowledge, which is sad but not very surprising. It takes a LOT of self-motivation and drive to actually put the theory into practice. A lot of guys are too caught up in old habits to try to change themselves.
But, as I discussed in my ‘No-Nonsense Guide to Motivation’ article [LINK], there are plenty of ways to get yourself out there on the streets. One option that I didn’t mention was putting yourself in a situation where approaching during the day becomes a necessity. Yup, you guessed it – street charity fundraising.
I know: those people can be very annoying. “Hello, sir. How are you today? Can I speak to you for just 2 minutes… one minute… how about 30 seconds?” However, it takes a LOT of perseverance and determination to do what they do. And in a way they are just professional daygamers: they have to open moving targets, convince them that they are worth their time and then close the deal at the end. Good street fundraisers are highly skilled at building rapport, which is vital in daygame.
Many cities are constantly hiring fundraisers – in fact, it’s one of the few industries that has grown since the recession. It pays reasonably well, too. And in the highly-likely event that you are offered a job, many companies give you a choice of charities to fundraise for. If you choose a charity whose aims appeal to you, chances are you’ll find the job considerably more rewarding and will get better results.
About Andy Yosha Yosha is the founder of Daygame.com a website solely dedicated to helping guys improve their ability to meet & attract beautiful women during the day. He has pulled together a team of the best daygamers and dating coaches in the world who post regular free articles and videos on Daygame.comto try and get everyone started on their exciting daygame journey.