The Man’s Approach (Part 2)
Today, Scot has released another free report that explains how to tell if a woman is interested.
4. You’ve done a lot of research and talked to a lot of women in preparation for this program… Is there any juicy tidbit of counter-intuitive knowledge you got out of any of the women?
Oh man. Let me tell you, one of the audios we arranged for the new program was a round table with three women where they had only one stated mission: Tell us what it is that men do when they meet you or on first dates that makes you physically, sexually aroused.
I actually shouldn’t mention this because it’s supposed to be a surprise “late breaking” addition to The Man’s Approach, but what’s recorded in that session is such a perfect answer to your question.
I have to admit, I couldn’t wait to edit that audio. I was dying to hear what they said.
And check it out. At first I was flat-out disappointed, even a bit annoyed. In my masculine way of thinking I considered their back-and-forth conversation to veer from the point a bit too much.
Then I listened to it again after I edited it. That’s when I realized what they were saying was GOLDEN. They were talking about physical, sexual arousal like WOMEN rather than men. It occurred to me that women look for their senses to be heightened by the presence of a masculine man, and that gets CONVERTED and returned to us as sexuality. The huge key is that SENSUALITY is the name of the game with women.
You see, when we start hamfisting our way through “sexual innuendo” and “escalating” in the name of trying to make women horny, we’re missing the point. The sad part is that this is transparent to women. It’s like if they treated us to a manicure for our birthday, or something. We’re thinking in terms of what would work on US rather than what really works with THEM.
One whisper in a woman’s ear can make all the difference. One sly smile across the table. One deftly opened bottle of wine. Even wearing the cologne that a WOMAN picked out rather than the same tired one you happened to like. All of these get a woman to feel sensually ALIVE. This sort of opens her being to masculine presence, and guess what? She gets hot for the guy who’s directly responsible.
And yes…it’s sort of like a boomerang. You “throw” sensuality, and it comes back to you as sexuality.
5. What is the first step a guy can take to change his style?
First step? Embrace being masculine. Stop feeling ashamed, stop buying into the believe that women want a “woman with a penis” for a boyfriend. They don’t–and that goes double for the feminine women you actually want the most.
Every shred of your being is transformed by understanding and expressing true masculinity as women define it (as opposed to “machismo”, which is what we do as guys to impress each other). It just wakes up women in a powerful way. That’s the best way to describe it.
I can throw in steps two and three here, also.
2) You’ve got to actually LIKE women. As long as you can’t stand them and/or blame them for all your dating failures, you certainly aren’t going to attract them.
3) You’ve got to help a woman feel COMFORTABLE in your presence. Attraction isn’t enough. She can be straight-up HOT for you, but if she doesn’t feel like you’ve got her best interests at heart she’s not going out with you. This is a major reason why women flake out on dates. They’re uncomfortable enough to resist telling you “no” in the moment, but then they just avoid you afterward. Interestingly, the converse–comfort WITHOUT attraction–is what puts guys in the “Just Be Friends Zone”. She’s endeared to you enough that she doesn’t want to completely blow you away emotionally, but since she’s not “feeling it” for you there’s no romantic flame there.
I’m tempted to say that one’s like Harley Davidson. If you have to ask, you wouldn’t understand. But that would be a cop out.
Truly, you can get an easy answer to this question by looking back to the seventh grade. The prevailing question we asked each other after one of us was with a girl was, “Did you get anything off of her?”
I think a lot of guys don’t ever outgrow that set of priorities. Even at age 35 or older they’re “hitting up” on women trying to “get some”.
Meanwhile, guys who have true options when it comes to women come from a position of abundance rather than scarcity. Whether it’s reality or not, they move through life as if they could call any one of 20 different women and have sex this afternoon. As a result, they can restrain themselves from any form of sex-focus at all. It’s almost as if they could say, “sex is overrated” to a woman. [laughs].
But see, under the surface both guys are the same. Both are turned on in a big way by a sexy woman. But like the older bull on the hill says to the young one who’s eager to “run down there and get a cow!”, the man among boys WALKS down to the valley and gets them ALL.
Women want to be holistically appreciated. And guess what? It’s actually a very fun and very fulfilling thing to have a holistically appreciated woman in one’s life. The things she’ll do to enhance your enjoyment of life above and beyond sex are virtually unknown to those who are still back in grade school trying to “get some”.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.