Ex Sex Comes at High Risk
People have a habit of getting back with their ex-girlfriends in some capacity. For some people it involves trying to fix past problems in the hopes that a more promising relationship will unearth itself.
For others, and you guys are the ones I’ll be focusing on here, it’s about just getting down to business.
Most of the times in a break-up, the physical attraction that was there doesn’t magically evaporate, just the emotional connection. So it would make sense that a potential for a relationship just consisting of hooking up exists.
These hormones, however, have the potential to leading to a very sticky situation.
Let’s assume that prior to entering a physical relationship, you both set certain rules. Say something along the lines of “We both know this isn’t going to work as a serious relationship, just something casual on the side. You know, something fun.”
That’s all great in principle and everything, but there are so many things that are bound to go wrong. Before you start having sex against with your ex, just make sure that you’re fully aware of what you’re about to get yourself into.
Take for example when you’re in the middle of boning. At those times you’re very vulnerable to thinking silly thoughts. With your head in a euphoric state, you begin to think that things could have worked out with you guys. In fact, you guys can still work things out. Those problems that you had earlier were over-exaggerated. Maybe after you finish up you can talk about starting things over again.
Hold your horses there, buddy. If you ever start thinking those things, wait at least a day to act on them.
When you’re in the moment like that, you’re bound to get wrapped up in the emotional aspects of sex. That sense of closeness that you feel there may only be caused by the act of sex instead of some deeper connection between the two of you.
That’s only the half of it. There are also a whole set of logistical issues that must be dealt with.
Does she sleepover? Do you sleepover?
What if she starts bringing her contact case over as a way of implying that she’s spending the night? Would it be awkward if you put your put down? Do you just skidaddle after five minutes of cuddling? Longer? And let’s pretend you do sleepover. What then?
Do you stay for breakfast? What if you decide to do stay and she makes you your favorite omelet? You know, the ones with some onions, banana peppers and just a enough cheese.
All of these problems arise because of a certain statement aforementioned. Let’s go back to it.
When you’re having sex with your ex, and you both know that you don’t want to get back together, you make a pact that reads something like: “We both know this isn’t going to work as a serious relationship, just something casual on the side. You know, something fun.”
The problem is, even with that boundary established, there are a handful of vague words in there.
Start out with “casual.” How casual is casual?
Does it mean you just show up for sex, no pleasantries, and leave when you’re done?
What about “on the side”?
That should mean that you’re allowed to hook up with other people. But come on, let’s be real here, if she hooks up with someone else and you hear about it, you’re going to be pretty jealous.
You would be jealous even if this was simply a girl you only knew for the past month and had been hooking up with. Someone who you were previously dating is only going to compound matters.
All of this discussion is not to say that it’s do-able. I’m only trying to get across the point that there will be many obstacles in your path. You would be foolish not to acknowledge those hurdles before you jump into the sack with your ex again.
About Mustafa Shaikh Mustafa Shaikh is an aspiring writer living in Berkeley, CA. Not willing to give up his college days just yet, he lives only a few blocks away from his beloved campus. He hopes to write a best-seller within the next couple of years and live off the royalties of it for as long as possible.