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Is She Friendly or Flirty?

You may think everything’s going to plan while you’re talking to a girl you’ve just met, but for all you know she is thinking that you could be her fabulous new best friend rather than a hookup. Here’s how to tell if she is just being friendly rather than flirting with you.

You see what you want to see

Which is it?

Keep in mind that it’s easy to construe her polite laughter at your unfunny jokes as flirting, because that’s what you’re expecting. If you’re not sure whether she’s flirting with you or just friendly, it’s probably because she’s not flirting with you in slightest. Try reassessing the situation without presuming that she’s interested and you’ll realise that she’s trying hard to send out friends-only vibes.

Laughter isn’t flirting

Giggling is always a good sign, but it doesn’t mean she’s interested. For all you know, she thinks of you as the ugly-but-hilarious guy friend. Or she’s just laughing excessively to cover how awkward she feels when you’re hitting on her. Laughter on its own does not tell you whether she is just being friendly, or if she’s interested. Similarly, light teasing can seem flirtatious, but that could just be how she relates to friends.

Is touch always flirty?

Touching usually indicates that she is flirting with you, but it could just be in her personality to be quite touchy-feely with people. Watch her interactions with her friends and with other people that she’s just met- if she seems to be touching them just as much, she doesn’t mean anything by it when she grazes against your arm. Anything more than a lingering touch is a serious sign she’s being more than friendly.

It’s all in the eye contact

She’s not going to gaze into your eyes adoringly if she wants to recruit you as her new shopping buddy. An exchanged look will give you the best idea of her intentions. If any eye contact when no words are being said is fleeting, she is trying very hard to friend-zone you. Whereas if she holds your gaze and gives you a knowing look, you can be sure that she’s been flirting. Even if she is too shy to maintain eye contact for long, you’ll know her thoughts if she becomes embarrassed when you catch her looking. She also won’t be trying to smile every time you catch her eye- that’s a warning sign that she’s only trying to be nice.

The follow up

If she was only being friendly, you’ll be able to tell if you stay in contact. It may seem counterintuitive, but the less excitable she is in communication to you, the better. If she wants to be friends only, she’ll reply to your texts with plenty of exclamation marks and might sign off with an affectionate ‘xox’. But if she is interested in you, she’ll want to play it cool and tone down her propensity to use excited punctuation.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/

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