Why the Self-Made Man is the ONLY Man
I wrote the first two paragraphs of this article as an essay. However, two paragraphs in, I realized this must be written as a RANT. Articulating the importance of “self-making” yourself isn’t a message best communicated by a chain of logic.
It’s best communicated by crawling into your subconscious and screaming.
So forgive my gratuitous use of explanation marks, CAPS-lock, and expletives BUT I NEED TO WAKE THE FUCK UP FROM THE COMA YOU’RE CURRENTLY LIVING IN AND MAKE YOU REALIZE EVERYTHING YOU THINK YOU KNOW ABOUT HOW THE FUCKING WORLD WORKS IS WRONG!!!!
(Deep breath, and begin.)
Look, the world isn’t fair. The “rules” you think you’re following—get a nice little job, work for an employer, eat according to the food pyramid, be a perfect gentlemen, open doors, pull out chairs, be nice to everyone—aren’t the “real” rules of the game.
They’re someone else’s rules—someone else’s idea of success and healthy living—that’s going to stake the deck against you so that one day you wake up and realize: oh shit, my life sucks.
Everything people told you about the world, RECONSIDER IT. Everything your parents told you about the world, RECONSIDER IT. Everyone I’m telling you about the world, RECONSIDER IT.
Too many men blindly follow the authoritative voice that commands them: do this, don’t do that, etc. Whenever anyone gives you a command, exercise your skepticism.
Don’t believe me? Examine your life. What aspects of your life are you most unhappy with right now? Be honest here. Probably the “pain points” of your life came from following someone else’s idea of “doing it right.”
Examples that stick out for me: the fucking food pyramid. For the first 12 years of my life—when eating was probably most important—I ate garbage. I shoveled junk into my body without ever thinking, “Maybe the advice I’m getting on nutrition is flawed.” I got fat and, to this day, I struggle to stay in shape because of the damage of someone else’s idea of “healthy eating.”
And other examples could roll off my tongue. The “attracting women” example. The “getting a 9-to-5 job” example. Whatever “do it this way” example you want to add, go for it.
One point I emphasize in all my articles and writings is embracing mistakes, and this is why. When you’re making mistakes at least you’re LEARNING FOR YOURSELF. Unlike the lemmings who just march in tune with whatever an authority figure tells them, you at least try an alternative.
It drives me crazy whenever people mock others who fail or are failing. The self-righteous jury loves to gossip about anyone who disrupts their fragile work view. If you hold yourself to your own standard of happiness, they’ll mock you.
Yet, another point I love to emphasize, is that when they’re mocking you, they’re also telling you that you’re doing it right. Thus, this article began as a rant and will end as an SOS. This is a distress signal from one self-made man to another: don’t give up.
When you’re feeling defeated, frustrated, or just like a failure, remember that it’s better to be a failure than a mediocre shithead who doesn’t adhere to his own standards of living. So try that new diet, approach that girl, start that company. Don’t just say you’re going to do it. FUCKING DO IT.
It’s the only way to know anything for certain.
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About Rob J. Rob J. is a writer and dating instructor in New York City. Themes that resonate in both his teaching and writing are masculinity, genuineness, rational self-interest, and general awesomeness.